The only thing you cannot run away from

Had you ever had the wish to just run away from something? Maybe because it's too much, maybe because you felt that you can't handle a situation? I had this wish - not only once in my life. I felt weak, thought I would probably blame myself and people might think I'm stupid or something.

When I was a kid I could not speak in front of the class. I was just too nervous, because everyone was looking at me. So I faked being sick, not feeling well. I thought before I say something weird, or sweating or opening my mouth without a single word to find its way out, I just run away. Well, not literally of course. It felt like this was the best thing to do. Now I know that running away is the easiest but never the best way.

Big Ben in London/UK
pic by Bob Jagendorf

Studying Media Management let me become even more awake of how important beauty and youth are these days. A celebrity without makeup is simply impossible, and it's not enough; they also need Photoshop to look even younger and fresher, better and more perfect. People wanna become old but no one wants to look old. So, do they really think they can run away from time? 

Time is everywhere. It surrounds us all. No matter how fast you try to run, it's impossible to be faster. Once it's gone, there is no chance to get it back. You all know this new word "YOLO", don't you? (for those who don't, it means "you only live once".)

Only the memories will still be forever in your mind. And that is a good thing, isn't it? You can't just delete something that happened. What is done will stay in the past, except for some reminders like pictures or videos. Or wrinkles. All these wrinkles tell your stories. When the same muscles on your face are active over and over again, they are proofs that you have laughed, that you have joy and happiness in your life. Do you want Hollywood to take that away from you? It's the place for actors, they play roles, and Hollywood wanna modify them. But you are not part of that big show. You are you, and you are wonderful and beautiful the way you are. And you don't really wanna look like a kid for the rest of you life, do you?

If time isn't there, nothing would ever happen. It would all stay the same. You won't meet new people, no kids would be born, you would always stay the same age. Okay, maybe when you are at a certain age you wanna stay like that, but how would your life be like, if it was endless and the same all the time? Would you appreciate the gift that you got? This unique and special gift? You only have one life, take the time that you have and enjoy it. Your life is worth living it!

You can't see it, you can't touch it,
but you know it's there: time
pic by Divi-ded

Sometimes it feels like time is just rushing by and sometimes it seems to be in slow motion. I remember when I was kid, I thought I will never be an adult. Days seemed to be endless. I went to school, I did my homework, I met my friends. I lived for every single day. Now I am planning. I have a schedule, things that have to be done. Time can be scary. It can be good too, like when you count down the days to meet a friend you haven't seen in a while. Studies proved that waiting for something positive to happen, can make you feel happier. When I have to speak in front of people these days, I don't try to run away from it, but instead of I face my fear. Although I can't wait for it to be over. It will never be one of my favorite things to do, but time gives me the chance to grow. To try things and to overcome my fears. 

Time can trap you in some ways. When you wait for the doctor or sitting at the bus station. Time seems endless, when you focus on it. When you look at your watch or your phone all the time. But when you don't think of time, it feels like it doesn't exist. You just live and enjoy your time. 

Time can be scary. But don't try to run away from it. Take time and enjoy your life. Don't try to think too much about it, don't try to hide it. Time feels to be different, depending on what you're doing, but it's constant. The seconds, the minutes, the hours, the days, the weeks, the months, the years. They will come and go. But the moments will remain in your minds, in your hearts. Time gives you good and bad moments, but it lets you overcome the bad ones sooner or later, and cherish all the good things happening to you.

It's time to enjoy and appreciate your time, your life. You can only look back at the past, but maybe the future holds something even better for you. Only time can tell....

Merry Christmas

I know that I haven’t been blogging much lately, but as some of you might know I’ve been pretty busy with college stuff. But anyway I wanted to wish you guys a Merry Christmas!!! I hope you can spend it with your families, with the ones you love and care about the most. Many can’t be home for the holidays, and I always remind me of that. How lucky and blessed I am that I can share these days with my family. Christmas is the time of love, to share it, that is the greatest gift of all: the present is a present. Try to capture that moment, try to inhale the joy and laughter and all the happiness, and whenever you struggle in the following years or your life turns into a bumpy ride, think back to those happy days. They give you the strength to never give up. No matter how hard times might be, Christmas is the time to forget the stress, the sorrows, all trouble and pain. When you are sick, or alone, when you have to work or can’t be with your family for which reason ever, keep in mind that you are never alone. Your family might not be with you physically but mentally they are. The spirit of Christmas is everywhere these days. When Christ was born he brought light, joy and hope to everyone. He brightens up our lives. Remind us that we don’t need much money, don’t need a big villa or a limousine to be happy. Happiness is an attitude. Think positive, laugh a lot, help others, show your love and support and you will receive appreciation and gratitude. And one day these people will come and help you when you need them. 

pic taken from weheartit.com

Maria and Joseph, two poor people, their lives weren’t easy at all. And even when they needed help the most, no one seemed to care. But they found a way. They were blessed and they knew it. They didn’t let anything tear them down, not even on a cold winter’s night when they weren’t able to spend it in a warm house. The warmth came to them and so the light, when Jesus was born. All sorrows were forgotten and their lives were filled with happiness. And that is what Christmas is about. Celebrating the miracle of life, to appreciate everyone you have in your life. Because all of them helped you to become who you are in this very moment.

That is also why I loved the Big Bang Theory Christmas episode this year. The friends celebrating Christmas all together but without Sheldon who doesn’t like Christmas for several reasons. One of them is giving a present of the same amount of money to the person who he receives a gift from. This was also discussed in this year’s Simpsons Christmas episode. For many people Christmas is just about the money. Something I don’t like either. You give something to someone you love and show this to that person. The thought counts. Something that wasn’t that expensive can have a high value to the person you give it to because it’s personal and it comes from you. Like when Sheldon received the napkin in season 2. First it was only a napkin, then he saw it’s signed by Leonard Nimoy and he even whipped his mouth at it - and so a simple napkin meant the world to Sheldon and he couldn’t find the appropriate present for Penny. This season the friends celebrated without Sheldon and that was a gift for him because he doesn’t like it, and they waited to celebrate till he was gone. It meant they thought of him. And they did.

took a screenshot of season 7's Big Bang Theory Christmas
episode while watching it on CBS website

Where would they all have been if Sheldon wasn’t in their lives? Anywhere else but not where they are. I love that thought. When I started this blog almost 2 years ago, I wrote the story of the actual Big Bang Theory by using the characters of the show. And it started with Sheldon. I doubt that any of the writers read my blog, so I love that they might think the same way I do. Sheldon wouldn’t be who and where he is without all of them either. (Though he would never admit that!) 

That his sister Missy was pregnant and gave birth to a son was also something I like. This tiny new person came like out of nowhere (at least for Sheldon’s friends this was big news), born on Christmas and will sure have an impact on Sheldon somehow. I doubt Missy will name him Jesus, but anyway, I love the idea of putting the birth of a son to a Christmas story. Though it might be too obvious and less creative for some guys but it just fits to the holidays and what we celebrate these days. Family comes together, friends come all together. The friends also allowed Stuart to celebrate with them, because no matter how lonely or upset someone might feel to be, on Christmas no one is really alone!!

I hope you have wonderful, peaceful holidays, may they be merry and bright, filled with cheer and joy. No matter where you are, you are not alone, never! There are people out there who love you, who care about you. Some you may not know yet, but once you will come into their lives like the big bang, out of nowhere, expanding in their lives, and they no longer wanna think about their lives without you. Because your family and friends are happy to have you in their lives and they wouldn't be the same without you. Enjoy the miracle: life! 

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

pic of my Christmas tree

The most precious

What is the most precious that you have? An elder woman once asked me this, and I was thinking about it. She said to me: Some people think they are rich when they have lots of money. Nowadays it's all about the money. People think they are only someone when they have enough of it, but no one ever has enough.

I guess she thought that I say the most precious in my life is something that I bought. And when I asked some of my friends the same question a few days later, most of them said something monetary. Some said their beds, their houses, their cars. And some guys never thought of that before.

When I answered the woman I said: my family. I told her that I'm happy to have them, my parents, my brother, my aunts, my uncles, and cousins, my Grandma. I'm also happy to have such amazing friends in my life.

She looked at me and smiled. I know that everything what really matters can't be bought, can't be replaced. When my computer or car is broken, I can find someone who might fix the problem or I buy a new one. When you lose someone you love, no one can give you this person back. When I grew up, three of my family members passed away and I asked my Mom why my friends can go to weddings and baptizings and I have to go to funerals. Of course she had no answer, but it let me realize that life doesn't last forever.

I looked at this woman who said to me: When you are in my age, you will know what is the most precious. Some have more, and some have less, but it's about the intensity, not the length. You can't buy it, you get in once, you have to spend it wisely, because when it's gone you'll never get it back. Money is important in our lives, and when you have some, you're lucky and can be happy about it. You can buy clothes, food, a house, but you can't buy time. You need time to spend with the ones you love, your family and friends. There is no better way to show someone you love them, than spending time with this person.

Inside the treasure chest

As it is, in my mind, something really important, and I thought about the moment and its uniqueness so intensively this week, I decided to dedicate this weekend to the moment. And so there is the second poem I wrote this week about our own biggest treasure chest, that we most of the time don't notice, but we all have one. So, what do you see, when you look inside of it?

When I felt lonely,
and couldn’t see any future,
couldn’t see how it should go on,
and what I am supposed to do,
a man showed up,
he just appeared, sat next to me.
We talked endlessly,
and it felt good.
When I asked him where he came from,
he looked at me, right into my eyes and said,
that he was here all the time,
I just haven’t noticed him.
I replied this can’t be possible,
but then he said that the eyes can’t see everything that is existing.
When I looked at him puzzled,
He asked me what my biggest treasure is.
I wondered about that question and said
that I’m not rich, that I don’t have much money,
no gold and not even a piece of jewelry.
He said that everyone has a treasure chest,
it’s full of something that is more precious than any money.
I was thinking about that,
me sitting in front of that chest, opening it, and see its content sparkling.
I would be rich, finally, my sorrows would all be gone,
and all my pain would be simply removed,
but then I asked myself why no one had ever told me about it.
So I asked him where mine is, where I could find my treasure chest.
And then he smiles: Right in front of you.

On September 27, the 6th season of The Big Bang Theory will start, time to get once again back to the first episode of the 5th season. The sentence ‘This is not what it looks like’ inspired me to write that short story about that not everything can be seen with the eyes, there are so many things we can’t see, but they are there anyway. And when three people look at the same thing, they don’t have to see the same thing, too. Wanna have an example? Let me explain it to you with that poem.

Imagine that treasure chest:

Penny opens it, and says: it’s empty

Sheldon opens it, and says: it’s filled with Nitrogen -- N2 -- 78.084%, Oxygen -- O2 -- 20.9476%, Argon -- Ar -- 0.934%, Carbon Dioxide -- CO2 -- 0.0314%, Neon -- Ne -- 0.001818%, Methane -- CH4 -- 0.0002%, Helium -- He -- 0.000524%, Krypton -- Kr -- 0.000114%, Hydrogen -- H2 -- 0.00005%, Xenon -- Xe -- 0.0000087%, Ozone -- O3 -- 0.000007%, Nitrogen Dioxide -- NO2 -- 0.000002%, Iodine -- I2 -- 0.000001%, Carbon Monoxide -- CO -- trace, Ammonia -- NH3 -- trace

I open it and say: it’s filled with time. Nothing is more precious than taking some time to spend and look at that chest, maybe sharing that moment with a person you love. Because time will become more and more precious in our world in which everything seems to rush faster and faster.

Source of chemical components of air: http://chemistry.about.com/b/2011/01/29/what-is-the-chemical-composition-of-air.htm