First episode of my sitcom 'Artists of Life'

Finally there it is - The Tryout Takeoff - the first episode of my sitcom 'Artists Of Life'. Like the pilot you can read the whole script here or on my Movellas site. A list with all episodes, and free download links can be also found when you click on 'Artists of Life' tab here on my blog. New episodes will be released every second Sunday. Please don't change anything or distribute any of the scripts without my permission. Thanks. Please feel free to tell me your opinion on it.

And here is a new interview of me talking about what's gonna happen in the first few episodes.

Click on the picture to open PDF-file to read the interview.
If a link isn't working, please write me. Thanks.

Afraid

Here's a new poem I wrote. Hope you guys like it and I can read your comments.

picture by Alyssa L. Miller

Why am I so afraid?
I know you won’t hurt me.
I want you to see me.
I want to be a part of your life.
I am just too afraid.
Afraid you don’t let me in
Afraid you’re gonna hate me for trying
Afraid you think I am just a weirdo,
One of so many out there
But I’m not.
I won’t hurt you, I want you to be happy.
I care for you so much.
I am afraid
I don’t wanna be afraid.
I wanna dare, I am simply too shy.
I really hope I can find a way,
Find it soon.
Wanna be part of your life,
But I don’t wanna hurt you, don’t wanna blame you.
Don’t want you to suffer.
Maybe I am a weirdo, maybe I think too complicated.
If I only wouldn’t be so afraid.
Why am I? Why can’t I dare?
I miss you, I love you.

Home

This is a new poem I wrote lately. Would love to read your comments about it. What does home mean to you?


Long time I was walking,
walking on a bumpy road.
Seeking for that place,
the place everyone’s talking about.
The place where I feel safe.
Where I feel at home.

I went by bus, by plane,
to saw places all over the world.
I travelled a lot,
because no one told me where that place is.
But where do people go to,
when they say they go home?

What is home?
And where is home?
Some say it’s where you grew up.
Some say it’s where your family lives.
Some say it’s just where you feel happy.

I want to feel happy,
and so I started walking.
Because I want to be happy,
I want to have a family, my family.
Some say that I’ll know it when I am home.
One day my searching was over.
When I met this guy,
and he showed it to me.
Home is not a place where you can go to,
it’s not under water, not in the sky,
it’s not a building.

You can go wherever you want,
and your home will be with you.
When you once found it,
and you are accepted,
that’s when you are at home.

Because home is where you feel happy,
where you feel safe.
And where can it be better
than in the heart of the one you love?

Pilot of Artists of Life

Here it is: the pilot of my first self-created sitcom called Artists of Life. I really hope you guys will like it and have fun reading it.



Please write me what you think of the story, the characters, what you like and what not, e.g. which scene was funny or maybe one you didn't understand. I'm gonna write some more episodes and I wanna improve it, so, also when you find any mistake, please don't hesitate to write me. Thanks.


I once asked on Twitter how to name the two main characters. And so goes some special and big THANKS to Cliff who gave Brent his name and Briony who named Gary. I hope you like 'your' characters ;)

So here is the link to the PDF. You can read it online or download it for free on your computer or any other device. But please don't change and/or distribute it in any way. If you wanna publish it or parts of it, please write me first. Thanks.

Last but not least some background info: In the scene in which Gary and Brent sit at the kitchen table, talking about Gary's plan how to solve their problem paying the rent, Brent says:

'15³ people? If that's your sensation magnitude, I might should relate it to your stimulus intensity.'

He refers to the Stevens' power law which is about the relation of real change and the felt change. Imagine you hold a glass of water. When someone puts a few drops in, you don't feel that the glass is heavier but actually it is. So a drop makes the glass already heavier but until you feel that's heavier you need a few milliliters of water. So in that scene he isn't sure if Gary's plan will work, and wanna relate the huge success that Gary expects with what will actually happen.

It's really interesting, so if you wanna know more about the Stevens' power law click here or on the wikipedia site.

Fate

I guess it was time again to write another poem. Please write me what you think of it. Thanks.

I know you are somewhere out there
I feel you every day.
I feel your presence,
I feel you next to me, even though I know you aren’t here.
Not with me, not in person.
Mentally you are here, close
Every day we get closer, the connection.
What hold us together?
Fate.
We are meant to find each other.
One day.
I am awaiting this day.
I know it will come.
I know it will come soon.
That I can not just feel you, that I can touch you.
That I see you not only with my heart
I wanna see you with my eyes, wanna hold you in my arms.
Embrace you tight.
I wanna smell you, I wanna hold you and wanna be held.
I need you, because I love you.
I haven’t met you, but I am waiting.
Because I know my waiting will soon be over.
I am waiting for this day to come, I am waiting for you.
My fate.

Inside the treasure chest

As it is, in my mind, something really important, and I thought about the moment and its uniqueness so intensively this week, I decided to dedicate this weekend to the moment. And so there is the second poem I wrote this week about our own biggest treasure chest, that we most of the time don't notice, but we all have one. So, what do you see, when you look inside of it?

When I felt lonely,
and couldn’t see any future,
couldn’t see how it should go on,
and what I am supposed to do,
a man showed up,
he just appeared, sat next to me.
We talked endlessly,
and it felt good.
When I asked him where he came from,
he looked at me, right into my eyes and said,
that he was here all the time,
I just haven’t noticed him.
I replied this can’t be possible,
but then he said that the eyes can’t see everything that is existing.
When I looked at him puzzled,
He asked me what my biggest treasure is.
I wondered about that question and said
that I’m not rich, that I don’t have much money,
no gold and not even a piece of jewelry.
He said that everyone has a treasure chest,
it’s full of something that is more precious than any money.
I was thinking about that,
me sitting in front of that chest, opening it, and see its content sparkling.
I would be rich, finally, my sorrows would all be gone,
and all my pain would be simply removed,
but then I asked myself why no one had ever told me about it.
So I asked him where mine is, where I could find my treasure chest.
And then he smiles: Right in front of you.

On September 27, the 6th season of The Big Bang Theory will start, time to get once again back to the first episode of the 5th season. The sentence ‘This is not what it looks like’ inspired me to write that short story about that not everything can be seen with the eyes, there are so many things we can’t see, but they are there anyway. And when three people look at the same thing, they don’t have to see the same thing, too. Wanna have an example? Let me explain it to you with that poem.

Imagine that treasure chest:

Penny opens it, and says: it’s empty

Sheldon opens it, and says: it’s filled with Nitrogen -- N2 -- 78.084%, Oxygen -- O2 -- 20.9476%, Argon -- Ar -- 0.934%, Carbon Dioxide -- CO2 -- 0.0314%, Neon -- Ne -- 0.001818%, Methane -- CH4 -- 0.0002%, Helium -- He -- 0.000524%, Krypton -- Kr -- 0.000114%, Hydrogen -- H2 -- 0.00005%, Xenon -- Xe -- 0.0000087%, Ozone -- O3 -- 0.000007%, Nitrogen Dioxide -- NO2 -- 0.000002%, Iodine -- I2 -- 0.000001%, Carbon Monoxide -- CO -- trace, Ammonia -- NH3 -- trace

I open it and say: it’s filled with time. Nothing is more precious than taking some time to spend and look at that chest, maybe sharing that moment with a person you love. Because time will become more and more precious in our world in which everything seems to rush faster and faster.

Source of chemical components of air: http://chemistry.about.com/b/2011/01/29/what-is-the-chemical-composition-of-air.htm

My first interview

This time I'll keep it very short. It's probably the most personal thing I've ever done. You might know that I study Media Management and that it's part of my studies to write articles for magazines, to design them and also to do interviews, photos and so on. So as my studies will continue in 2 weeks, I thought why not doing an interview with me? It was a good practice for me and another chance to write what's on my mind. I struggled a bit but in the end, but then I thought why not putting it on my blog?

The interview is about when I started to write, how I came back after some years of not writing at all, when I realized what I missed all the time, how much it helped me, what inspires me, what I like about TV shows, plays and movies, and why the internet is so important these days. So if you want to, feel free to click here to open the PDF and read my first interview.

The Sun

Here is my new poem 'The Sun'. Hope you guys like it. I would appreciate it a lot if you would leave me a comment what you think about it.

Walked through the dark
across the park.
No light, but silence and cold,
felt so lonely and old,
painful, shivering and weak
and completely unable to speak.

But then an embrace,
warmth touched her face.
Then a sparkle, a light
and it brightened up her night.
It started to shine,
and she stopped to whine.

For that moment so brief,
she felt like robbed by a thief.
Someone took it,
tightly holding it,
didn’t want to give it back,
and she thought ‘what the heck?’

Like wearing glasses,
she suddenly could see the masses,
the masses of colors and light
won that long lasting fight.
Cozy like in front of a fireplace
she only felt the tight embrace.

Her world started to move again,
left behind the storm, the rain, the pain.
The night was gone,
he was the one,
who brought her back to life
and let soon might be his wife.

The light beat the night,
the cold was put on hold,
She felt the breeze, the squeeze.
He made her alive, dancing jive,
singing along wasn’t wrong
and she wasn’t lying, it felt like flying.

The past was past,
the pain was vast.
But she lives for the future,
still visible are her wound’s suture,
but that will blur and vanish soon,
all fears will be banished until noon.

He made her world turning,
shining warm but not burning.
First he was the moon at night,
shone so bright,
guided her through the park,
and through a world so dark.

The ‘he’ is you and her am I,
I just stopped being shy,
and telling you why
I am so glad you came by.
Because now life’s so much fun,
with you, the warmth, the light, my sun.

by Sanny Spear, August 2012

Anxiety of Misfortune

This is my new short story. I hope you'll like it ;)

Deep inside she felt it. Knew it was wrong. But she couldn't do anything about it. She couldn't change the fact. She knew that she had to do it. She wanted it more than anything else. For such a long time. She couldn't exactly remember when this started, when and how it began. But she was sure that she didn't want to go back. She didn't want to lose her memory. Because it changed her in a way she couldn't describe. She didn't have the words, she couldn't tell anyone about it. No one would ever believe her. They might say that she's living a dream, that she tried to convince herself that this is real. It's only her imagination. But was it really like that? Was this only in her mind? Something she just created in her head? No, this could not be possible. No doubt. This had to be the reality. It couldn't be explained any differently. She hadn't started this. It was not her fault that it all happened like this. It wasn't her intention that this man came into her life. She had never seen him before, not even heard his name. How would she have known that it once would be like this? She couldn't predict the future. This couldn't be her fault. No way. Why did people try to convince her that it's just her imagination that let her see the things like that? Even when they're different? What is real and what's a stupid lie? She had to figure out the truth. What is hidden behind? Could she find it? Was there a possible, logical way to find out? She tried to remember the beginning of all this. Of the things that occurred to her in the last year. She had to find out if it was some sort of dream. Had the people really tried to tell her she believes in a lie or was that only her imagination? She couldn't say that, not yet.

I don't want this blog post to be very long, that's why I made a whole site for the whole story. So if you wanna go on reading, please click here....

Project #1

As I already mentioned yesterday I have finished my first English script. I don’t wanna make any money with it, I just wanna share it with you. It’s my first one and so I know it’s far away from perfection. So please, if you know how to improve my writing and what to do better the next time, write me. Of course you can also write me when you like something.

It is pure fiction with some science. As you might know The Big Bang Theory inspired me in so many ways, and when it came into my life last year, it helped me to find back to the writing. So I thought what might could happen to these guys during a break on set.

I do not know any of them personally, so it’s just the names of the guys I have used. Everything they say and do isn’t real and it will never happen like that. It’s not a story pitching, because I don’t wanna get in trouble with any of the guys. The story doesn’t include the characters of the show, it’s more related to the actors. I don’t know if they would really act like that, and I don’t wanna put someone in a bad light. Some scenes might sound a bit silly, but it’s only because it’s supposed to be a little bit comic. It will never be part of the show, but that is not my intention. It is just for you to read – no further publishing, no selling - only if someone is interested in.

The story will have 22 parts. On every workday of July I will publish one part of the story. When July has passed I will save the whole story as a pdf-file and if you wanna have the full story, you can ask me then.

So the story will start on Monday, and I really hope you like it – even though you don’t like the Big Bang Theory.

- Additionally I will also go on writing about some other topics like usually.

Save you

Everytime I listen to the song 'Save you' by Kelly Clarkson, I have this short movie in my mind, like a music video. I don't know if she really means what I see in it. It's really touching, I like that song. Maybe I will tape the vid one day, but for now I thought I write at least some lines about it. I dedicate this to everyone who once lost a loved person. I had lost so many family members in a short period of time. First died my grandpa, then my two grandmas. My friends went to weddings and I to funerals. I hated that time. Especially when you are a kid, you can't understand why. I still can't, and I still miss them. But I believe that true love can even survive death, because love is immortal.


When I heard that song again yesterday, the vid came back into my mind. It's about a girl who is mortally ill, but she doesn't want to tell her boyfriend because she doesn't want him to suffer and to be sad. But he cares about her because he loves her so much, and so he figured it out. And this is like a letter, the things she wanna say to her love:

Save you

I wish I could save you. I wish I could stay, but you know that I can’t. I never wanted to leave you. And I want you to know, I will never leave you completely. I will always follow you, no matter where you go. I didn’t want to tell you that I have to go, because I never wanted to hurt you. But since you figured it out, I feel something has changed.

I wish I could save you, honey. I wish I could take all the pain away from you. I don’t wanna see you suffering, I don’t wanna see your tears. I need you to smile. I wish I could tell you, it’s gonna be alright. I wish I could ease your pain. But I know that I can’t. I will forever be with you, forever by your side.

Please stop crying, honey, I don’t wanna cry. I want you to smile, I want you to go on for me. I hope you’ll never forget me, as I will never forget you. You’ve been the greatest and best, that ever happened to me. You made me alive. Please understand, that I have to leave. I would love to stay, so please just never forget me.

I will go on living inside of you. Stop crying, smile for me. Just one last time. I wish I could save you, I wish I could say that it’s gonna be alright. I wish I could ease your pain. I love to see your smile, I love to see you being happy. I still love you and forever will.

Next day, next month, next chapter

Welcome June, I hope everyone of you had a wonderful year of 2012 so far. I honestly can't believe that 5 months have already passed. Back as a kid, I remember times were passing so much slower. At least, it felt for me like that. Maybe because you just lived for every single day. Now you have work to do, things that need to be written by a specific day at the latest and stuff like that. I guess you all know what I mean.

This time, I keep it very short. I finally put some info about me on that page, that you all can read and know more about me and my work. I will also soon add some pics of me, to make my page more personal.

If you wanna ask me something and/or wanna give me some feedback, please feel free to do that.

Thanks for taking some of your precious time to stop by. I wish you all a wonderful Friday.

Let's go treasure hunting

I love writing a lot, otherwise I wouldn’t write almost daily. I write in my blog, I also write on my first book, I write on a play as well. I have so many thoughts in my head to write about. I have my smartphone always with me that I can write a memo with my thoughts, so I won’t forget anything.

I get inspired by life. So many things are happening, I meet different people, see different stuff on TV and read news on the Internet and so on. Life is like treasure hunting. You get so many information and you have to figure out how to handle them. What is worth writing about it, and how do you find the right words to tell about?

Writing is not always easy. Sometimes you sit in front of the Computer and just type and type and type and the words come out so easily. But sometimes you know exactly what you wanna write about but you are looking for the right words. First you seek after interesting stuff - you don’t have to search it, it just comes to you, you just have to see that it is something interesting - and then you think about how to write a worthy article about it or a blog entry like I do.

Finding the right words is never easy. You maybe know that in some situation when you have to explain something that was not so good or you’re not proud of, it's not that easy to write about it. I deal with it many times, but I take that challenge and it makes fun. It’s new, every single day is different, as every article, every blog entry. As every single person on earth has her or his own story to tell, I try to tell stories, about people and the things in my life, in our life. There’s a lot to explore, let’s dig for words, dig for all interesting. Let’s go treasure hunting.