Happy new year!!!

This is my last blog post this year and I wanna wish you all a wonderful and happy new year 2014!!! May it be joyful and successful. When I look back I realize that it wasn't an easy and definitely not the best year of my life. So I really hope for a better 2014!!! But it wasn't that bad and it was another chapter of my life who made me the person I am today.

In 2014 I wanna travel more, earn more money to see the world and meet my friends who don't live pretty close where I live. I also wanna show them more how much they mean to me and how blessed I feel to have them in my life. I spent Christmas with my family, and it was great that my cousin came from Crete to celebrate with us. She, her hubby and their son leaved this morning. Next year I plan to visit them!

I took some time this holidays to think about my life, the things I wanna change but also the things I'm glad they happened. My time at college is almost over, and I hope to finally get some positive feedback and get a chance to work again. I also wanna write more, I have so many stories in my head, so I wanna take more time for me and do what I love so much. I think sometimes it's important to switch the everyday stress off, as hard as it is. Sometimes it could help to only switch off my phone one evening because I really don't like it to be permanent online because I think this can cause stress too. I mean when something really important happens these people can reach me without whatsapp or what ever.

For me the greatest joy is when I see a smile on the faces of the people I love. That is the greatest gift, and as important money these days is, I try to remind me more often next year, that everything that really matters is not a thing and can't be bought.

Do you have new year's resolutions? How was your 2013? I hope you had a great year and find something positive that happened this year, and I wish you a great new year 2014!!! Take care!! xoxo San

Merry Christmas

I know that I haven’t been blogging much lately, but as some of you might know I’ve been pretty busy with college stuff. But anyway I wanted to wish you guys a Merry Christmas!!! I hope you can spend it with your families, with the ones you love and care about the most. Many can’t be home for the holidays, and I always remind me of that. How lucky and blessed I am that I can share these days with my family. Christmas is the time of love, to share it, that is the greatest gift of all: the present is a present. Try to capture that moment, try to inhale the joy and laughter and all the happiness, and whenever you struggle in the following years or your life turns into a bumpy ride, think back to those happy days. They give you the strength to never give up. No matter how hard times might be, Christmas is the time to forget the stress, the sorrows, all trouble and pain. When you are sick, or alone, when you have to work or can’t be with your family for which reason ever, keep in mind that you are never alone. Your family might not be with you physically but mentally they are. The spirit of Christmas is everywhere these days. When Christ was born he brought light, joy and hope to everyone. He brightens up our lives. Remind us that we don’t need much money, don’t need a big villa or a limousine to be happy. Happiness is an attitude. Think positive, laugh a lot, help others, show your love and support and you will receive appreciation and gratitude. And one day these people will come and help you when you need them. 

pic taken from weheartit.com

Maria and Joseph, two poor people, their lives weren’t easy at all. And even when they needed help the most, no one seemed to care. But they found a way. They were blessed and they knew it. They didn’t let anything tear them down, not even on a cold winter’s night when they weren’t able to spend it in a warm house. The warmth came to them and so the light, when Jesus was born. All sorrows were forgotten and their lives were filled with happiness. And that is what Christmas is about. Celebrating the miracle of life, to appreciate everyone you have in your life. Because all of them helped you to become who you are in this very moment.

That is also why I loved the Big Bang Theory Christmas episode this year. The friends celebrating Christmas all together but without Sheldon who doesn’t like Christmas for several reasons. One of them is giving a present of the same amount of money to the person who he receives a gift from. This was also discussed in this year’s Simpsons Christmas episode. For many people Christmas is just about the money. Something I don’t like either. You give something to someone you love and show this to that person. The thought counts. Something that wasn’t that expensive can have a high value to the person you give it to because it’s personal and it comes from you. Like when Sheldon received the napkin in season 2. First it was only a napkin, then he saw it’s signed by Leonard Nimoy and he even whipped his mouth at it - and so a simple napkin meant the world to Sheldon and he couldn’t find the appropriate present for Penny. This season the friends celebrated without Sheldon and that was a gift for him because he doesn’t like it, and they waited to celebrate till he was gone. It meant they thought of him. And they did.

took a screenshot of season 7's Big Bang Theory Christmas
episode while watching it on CBS website

Where would they all have been if Sheldon wasn’t in their lives? Anywhere else but not where they are. I love that thought. When I started this blog almost 2 years ago, I wrote the story of the actual Big Bang Theory by using the characters of the show. And it started with Sheldon. I doubt that any of the writers read my blog, so I love that they might think the same way I do. Sheldon wouldn’t be who and where he is without all of them either. (Though he would never admit that!) 

That his sister Missy was pregnant and gave birth to a son was also something I like. This tiny new person came like out of nowhere (at least for Sheldon’s friends this was big news), born on Christmas and will sure have an impact on Sheldon somehow. I doubt Missy will name him Jesus, but anyway, I love the idea of putting the birth of a son to a Christmas story. Though it might be too obvious and less creative for some guys but it just fits to the holidays and what we celebrate these days. Family comes together, friends come all together. The friends also allowed Stuart to celebrate with them, because no matter how lonely or upset someone might feel to be, on Christmas no one is really alone!!

I hope you have wonderful, peaceful holidays, may they be merry and bright, filled with cheer and joy. No matter where you are, you are not alone, never! There are people out there who love you, who care about you. Some you may not know yet, but once you will come into their lives like the big bang, out of nowhere, expanding in their lives, and they no longer wanna think about their lives without you. Because your family and friends are happy to have you in their lives and they wouldn't be the same without you. Enjoy the miracle: life! 

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

pic of my Christmas tree

Being perfectly me

Last Friday Oct 18, Jim Parsons and Todd Spiewak won the Inspiration Award at the GLSEN Respect Awards in LA. GLSEN is a Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network. The Big Bang Theory star and his partner seemed to be surprised that, like they called it "boring lives", inspire others. They might live in Hollywood but they seem to have a very normal life when Jim spoke about them having coffee in the morning, doing the laundry and taking their two dogs for a walk. But exactly that is something inspiring. When I grew up I learned that is not important to be rich, it's important to be happy. Sure Jim is blessed with both, and as much as he appreciates the success of the show he's part of, he even more appreciates what he shares with Todd. 

As an actor you have to be one guy today and a total different one the other day. Even people who don't see themselves as actors, do act sometimes. And some even get lost in their self-created characters. This is what happened to Lady Gaga. When I read in an interview that she wants even her mother to call her like that, and not Stefani, her real name, anymore, I was truly shocked. I mean I love her music, do doubt, but in my mind she's overdoing it too often. She is seeking for the spotlight, she wants to be seen all the time. When you look at some old pictures of her, she seemed to be a shy girl, quite the opposite she is right now. But what makes people to change so much? 

Show everyone around you all your colors.
Their mixture makes you special, makes you who you are.

I am far away from being perfect. I am not a Lady Gaga who wants to be in the spotlight. My parents taught me to be humble, to appreciate the little things in life. When two or more people talk, I can't just join the conversation. I only do it when I am asked directly. It's just something that I learned. I don't wanna bother anyone. Sure I sometimes have the wish that my life should be more exciting. But the longer I think about that wish, the more I realize that it already is exciting. I have a wonderful family and amazing friends who never left my side. What is more important than that? It's nothing that I can take for granted. I love to go to college, I love to see my fellow students. When I think back, everything I did the past 25 years of my life, I would do it all again the same way if I could relive it.

Lady Gaga didn't seem to be happy with her life. As much as I love to create characters and to tell stories, I never wanted to become an actress. People would know when I'm acting. That makes me even more fascinated by guys who can do that, like Jim. But he knows when he is acting. Some others not. We girls put on some makeup before we leave our homes, but we don't put on new faces. Lady Gaga wants to do everything to be seen, she wants everyone to talk about her. She lives like she's the sun in her own solar system. She is the big star. No matter where in the solar system you are, you have to see her. But I wonder what might happen if she becomes a white dwarf. Being always on the top is a very tough job. She is a fighter, that's for sure, but could she handle it to not be seen anymore and become again who she once was?

We are who we are, because of the people we are with. 

Stefani Germanotta didn't like what she saw when she looked in the mirror every morning. So she created a new person: Lady Gaga. But the fact she wasn't happy helped her to become what she is now: happy. And that's the most important thing. Do what feels right for you to do, be who you are. Some people might try to hide themselves, so they try to pretend to be someone else. We are changing all the time. When we grow up we don't see any change because it's a slowly process, but people who don't see us every day say something like: you grew a lot since last time I saw you.

As adults we still grow every day, but on the inside. At some point we put it on the outside too. No one wants to be the same his entire life. We need to be challenged, but over all we need to be who we are, ourselves. When I look in the mirror, I am happy. I am no Hollywood star, I'm not a famous actress or singer. But that's not what I want to be. I also don't see perfection, I do have my issues, but these make me just me. All my memories, all the decisions I made, all the people I have in my life, they all help me to just be me. And that's also something Jim Parsons said in his acceptance speech last Friday in LA at GLSEN Awards too. "...We (Jim + Todd) are both surrounded by so many people who make our lives better and easier, friends we've had for many years and friends we've made since living in L.A."

Live your life. Maybe you think it's boring, but it's your life and when you don't live it who does? Everyone can inspire other people when he dares to be himself and don't try to act, not try to hide behind a self-created character. I love to write and I love to tell stories, but I mostly love to tell my story. Here on this blog I do that, not as often as one year ago, but I still love to tell you guys new chapters now and then and what's going on in my mind. Inspiration comes from being you. So what do you see when you look in the mirror? Does it reflect yourself?

Do all kids love TV?

Kids. They laugh, they run around, they scream, they play. They are anything but quiet, except they are sitting in front of a TV. Sounds familiar?

The TV is for most kids the best friend somehow. They love to spend their time only looking at the screen. Mostly because many parents just need a little break, so they switch on the TV, let it 'take care' of their kids. For many people it's actually the first thing to do in the morning, before they prepare breakfast. Living without it? No way.

So I was thinking how important is TV in our everyday life? How much does it affect and influence us? How would our life be like without TV? And is it possible to have some happy days when we don't have the chance to watch anything on the screen?

I already told you about Aly, my friend's 4-year old daughter. In many ways she lets me think twice about stuff and gives me another point of view. So I decided to talk to my fave little girl. Aly always smiles when she sees me. Last time I visited her she took my hand and guided me into her room. "Come, I wanna show you something", Aly said. Her Mom bought her a puppet theater and she handed me two of her puppets. "You play the prince and his speaking horse and I am the beautiful princess." "So only I have to play a role?", I asked and Aly grinned.

The moments mother and daughter spend together are priceless.
pic by Rolands Lakis

We played a while and then she told me she loves the theater. "It's always different, not like on TV." Many people look at a screen, they all see exactly the same. But when you watch a play, every performance is different. I haven't actually thought about it that way before, so I thank Aly for that. She doesn't really like watching TV much, maybe because her Mom doesn't like it either.

do you prefer to see a play or a TV show?
pic by Diego Torres Silvestre

They prefer to do their own shows - these were the words Aly used. Being only one of 1,000 people isn't that difficult - she clearly doesn't know how many people actually watch a TV show, but that's nothing that matters to get her point - being one of two is something really special. "Only me and my Mom know what we do and I love that", she said.

"People only think in large numbers. But why? Why should that be better?" I couldn't give her a real answer. Why is it better being one of a million than one of two? Sounds more rare, special? But is it really special to know something that everybody knows? When you watch TV it's always the same, that's not close to real life. You can watch the same show twice and nothing changes. But when you watch the same play several times, it's always a bit different.

You are full of wonder

You are special, you are unique, you matter. I never understood people complaining about their lives only because they are no superstars like Neil Patrick Harris who hosts the 65th Primetime Emmys today. Sure I'm gonna watch that show. It's my second fave award show after the Tonys and so I look forward to it every year. But as much as I like it, I can't imagine to go on such a stage and receive an award one day, though it must be an overwhelming feeling to be honored by people who know good quality and appreciate your work. But all these actors, writers and creative minds who work in the TV business do this primarily to entertain people, not to get an award one day.

If your heart turns blue, I want you to remember This song is for you, and you are full of wonder 

-Emelie Sandé, Wonder 

I enjoy to take care of my best friend's 2-year old daughter Ella. I love it when I play with her, tell her stories and she smiles. That's my award. That's what makes me happy and when I know I'm doing the right thing. At the Emmys people are nominated and already that is an honor of which most people can only dream. But the viewers mostly are interested in the winners. For me the Emmys is a celebration where all these talented and creative minds come together and have a great evening. These are the people who bring us joy and fun every week. For some guys these people are like family because they come into their homes, weekly or even daily, and become part of their lives.

Without them, without the TV and all these good shows, our lives would be less... (you can fill the gab with your own words, but something would be missing, wouldn't it?)
These guys fill the gap. They share their visions, their passions with us and inspire us in so many ways. You might not be one of these TV people but you can share your passion too. Don't act, don't try to pretend being someone else. Show people who you are and that's when you start to create wonder. You are full of wonder. You can't act like having a passion only because you wanna be rich and famous. Not even an actor can have success for a long time when he only does it because of the money.

You wanna be successful? Be yourself and see all the wonder that are inside of you. The real award is not a trophy, that's only a symbol, a visualization. The real award is the smile in someone's face, touching only one person can change her life and that makes it worth doing whatever you do.

For me it's not just a saying that all nominees are winner. We all tend to compare ourselves to those who might have a better life, so that we get motivated and maybe one day we will be on the same level with them. It's good to win, it's good to be the best, but that's not everything. Everyone in this world is part of it, everyone matters.

The one who inspired me to write this post is British singer Emelie Sandé. Every time I listen to her song "Wonder" I feel so much better. When you be yourself you are able to touch people and that is the award that really matters. A trophy can be bought, a smile not.

The power of fantasy

“Can you imagine losing your fantasy?” That’s what I asked Aly lately, and she wildly shook her head.  “Not in a million years”, she said. Aly is the daughter of one of my friends. She is 4 years old and since I know her I learned a lot. She became one of my biggest inspirations in my life, and my writing. Fantasy is the base, or the core of writing and this little girl has an infinite amount of ideas and stories in her head. She uses her imagination to explore the world. There’s so much she doesn’t know but somehow she does, only without knowing.

Can a single drop be like a gate into another world?
pic by Andrea

I remember one day when Jim, a good friend of mine, and I were picking up Aly for eating some ice cream. Soon she started talking excitedly about the ice princess with her strawberry dress and her vanilla skin, and her chocolate hair. “It’s maybe too sad to eat her,” Aly said. “She is just so beautiful, but of course she is, she is a princess. Aren’t all princesses beautiful?” “Sure they are,” I replied. “But the sun doesn’t like her. I don’t like that. Why can’t it let the princess live longer?” “Well, ice melts when it’s too warm”, Jim tried to explain. “But it’s not fair for the ice princess. She has such a short life. So I will enjoy her beauty as long as I can.”

When she saw her princess, Aly’s eyes started sparkling. She was looking at the ice cream, like she never saw something like this before. “Life is short. Most people would gulp you down in a rush. Not me. I’m not in a hurry. I know that I will never see you again. You are special and beautiful.” Jim and I looked at each other, then at our ice creams on the table. At this moment I wish I could see the princess, but all I saw was ice cream. That made me a little upset and Aly noticed that. I didn’t want to tell her that somehow all grown-ups lose more and more of their imagination and see it all differently. So I told her about my other big wish.

“I want to have a dog, most of all a Maltese. They are just the cutest”, I gushed. It’s all true, but as long as I go to college I simply can’t have one. Aly looked at me with her blue eyes and smiled. “The longer you wait, the happier you will be when your wish comes true.” The next day I visited her Mom. We sat in the kitchen and talked. Then Aly came in, holding a shoe box in her hand. She gave it to me with a big smile on her face. “Here. That’s what you wished for.” I took the box; it felt empty, so I didn’t open it but asked Aly what that was. “In it is your Maltese, white, fluffy and so sweet.” 

picture by Fireangel33

The most precious

What is the most precious that you have? An elder woman once asked me this, and I was thinking about it. She said to me: Some people think they are rich when they have lots of money. Nowadays it's all about the money. People think they are only someone when they have enough of it, but no one ever has enough.

I guess she thought that I say the most precious in my life is something that I bought. And when I asked some of my friends the same question a few days later, most of them said something monetary. Some said their beds, their houses, their cars. And some guys never thought of that before.

When I answered the woman I said: my family. I told her that I'm happy to have them, my parents, my brother, my aunts, my uncles, and cousins, my Grandma. I'm also happy to have such amazing friends in my life.

She looked at me and smiled. I know that everything what really matters can't be bought, can't be replaced. When my computer or car is broken, I can find someone who might fix the problem or I buy a new one. When you lose someone you love, no one can give you this person back. When I grew up, three of my family members passed away and I asked my Mom why my friends can go to weddings and baptizings and I have to go to funerals. Of course she had no answer, but it let me realize that life doesn't last forever.

I looked at this woman who said to me: When you are in my age, you will know what is the most precious. Some have more, and some have less, but it's about the intensity, not the length. You can't buy it, you get in once, you have to spend it wisely, because when it's gone you'll never get it back. Money is important in our lives, and when you have some, you're lucky and can be happy about it. You can buy clothes, food, a house, but you can't buy time. You need time to spend with the ones you love, your family and friends. There is no better way to show someone you love them, than spending time with this person.

Suddenly too soon

Today is my birthday and normally I should be happy, thinking about the beauty of life, how lucky I am to have these amazing people, my family and friends in my life and all the wonderful guys I 'met' online, and I am happy but I'm also sad at the same time. Last Monday I heard that Cory Monteith died, who played Finn Hudson on Glee. I was shocked and still can't believe it. I can still read the Tweets he wrote last week, he posted a picture, I saw him on TV so often, was impressed by his singing and acting and now he's just gone. It's like when Heath Ledger, Aaliyah and Brittany Murphy died. All so young and talented, and it happened just too soon. 

Now it's revealed that Cory died because of a heroin and alcohol overdose, and once again I'm shocked. Drugs are so often the reason of many people's deaths, so why do still so many take them? It's not on me to tell people what to do and what not, but I hope that at least some guys realise what drugs can cause them, and as hard as it might be, they should try their best to get rid of them or better, do not even start taking them.

Source: Quote that talk Tumblr

It doesn't matter how you lose a beloved person, it's always horrible. Even more when you are far away, and it happened in a sudden. When I first read how Jim Parsons lost his Dad, I couldn't and still can't imagine how he must have felt back then. He had been very close to his Dad, he supported Jim and his wish to become an actor all the time, and while Jim was working on his final project, shortly before his graduation, his Dad died in a car accident. Jim came from San Diego, where he was studying, back to Houston and he didn't wanna finish his Master's degree at first, but then he did it. He realised that he "could only be of use to the family fully if [he] did what [he] needed to do and then went on...". Jim also told Pop Matters that he had a terrible sense of direction but his Dad was good at it, and when he went to New York after his graduation, he knew how to get around so quickly that it boggled his mind. This all reminded me of what my Mom told me when her Mom died in the year 2000. I felt her presence though my eyes were unable to see her. I knew she was there and still is, because like Antoine de Saint-Exupéry wrote in "The Little Prince": 

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

For me, heaven is not a place up above, it is in the heart of the people we love. When the soul has to leave its body, it will find its peace and be in heaven, when it can continue to live in the people she loves and who loves her. Some fans of Michael Jackson or Elvis think they are still alive and they are somehow, as long as there are people whe won't forget them. Through their music they will always be part of our lives.

picture by Vincent Lock 

Reading about someone who died is always a shock when she was part of your life, and it reminds me of how fast everything can be over. No one wants to talk about it, to think of it, but we have to face it because it's part of our lives. I lost three loved family members when I was a kid, and I never understood why they went. It's hard to realise that you will never see this person again, someone you grew up with, someone you spent so much time with. To realise you will never talk to her, never give her a hug, never hear her voice again, makes me so frightened. 

I thank God that I can celebrate my birthday today, that I completed another year of my life, and I hope much more of them are still to come. I don't take life for granted, and also not all the things I have. I feel lucky and blessed. My prayers go to Cory's family and to his girlfriend Lea Michele. And I dedicate this poem I wrote last year after the Mom of one of my friends died, to everyone who lost a loved person:

Save you

I wish I could save you. I wish I could stay, but you know that I can’t. I never wanted to leave you. And I want you to know, I will never leave you completely. I will always follow you, no matter where you go. I didn’t want to tell you that I have to go, because I never wanted to hurt you. But since you figured it out, I feel something has changed.

I wish I could save you, honey. I wish I could take all the pain away from you. I don’t wanna see you suffering, I don’t wanna see your tears. I need you to smile. I wish I could tell you, it’s gonna be alright. I wish I could ease your pain. But I know that I can’t. I will forever be with you, forever by your side.

Please stop crying, honey, I don’t wanna cry. I want you to smile, I want you to go on for me. I hope you’ll never forget me, as I will never forget you. You’ve been the greatest and best, that ever happened to me. You made me alive. Please understand, that I have to leave. I would love to stay, so please just never forget me.

I will go on living in you. Stop crying, smile for me. Just one last time. I wish I could save you, I wish I could say that it’s gonna be alright. I wish I could ease your pain. I love to see your smile, I love to see you being happy. I still love you and forever will.

Getting a closer look how German TV is made

ZDF Fernsehgarten

Last Friday I had the opportunity to go to Mainz in Germany to visit the ZDF studios. ZDF is a German TV channel which is also known as "Zweites Deutsches Fernsehen" ("Second German TV Channel). It has studios all over the world, from New York to Toykio, and also one in every German Bundesland. But the main studios are in Mainz and I was so much looking forward to this, because I like many shows on that channel and I just love to get a closer look how German TV works and how some shows are produced. So I was excited, and it was very intersting. I learned a lot about how the make their daily News Show and how stressful this job is, I saw some sets and studios, the control room, storage place for all the costumes and so much more.

From May till October ZDF shows the Fernsehgarten which is a show that contains music and acrobatic acts; beauty, cooking and gardening tips, sports talk and much more. I mostly love it because the whole show is filmed outside, and I love such summer shows. It has a variety of different things, so it's one of those shows you can go to with your whole family and everyone finds something she likes. There are not many shows like that on TV.

Normally the Fernsehgarten is shown every Sunday, but not today because of "Wetten, dass...?", the most popular German TV show (I already wrote twice about Samuel Koch who had a bad accident on the show in December 2010). The summer edition of the show takes place in Palma de Mallorca, and many people from ZDF had to fly to the Spanish isle to prepare the show and so there were not enough people this week for the Fernsehgarten.

pics from the place where the ZDF Fernsehgarten is filmed

"Wetten, dass...?" is about different bets. So everyone who can do something incredibly, whatever it is but mostly some kinda crazy (because this is TV and you want people to talk about you) can place a bet. If he gets invited to the show, the contestant tells something about himself, shows his bet and has the chance to win a car. 4 bets are shown in every show, plus one children bet.

I really love such summer shows which doesn't need a studio. I like it more when it's outside and I really liked yesterday's show. My favorite bet was the man who jumped into his pants. So now if you're a man, this is how you have to put on your pants :D

Have you already made a studio tour? Which shows do you like on TV? Do you prefer shows filmed in a studio or outside? Please leave a comment below.

First episode of my sitcom 'Artists of Life'

Finally there it is - The Tryout Takeoff - the first episode of my sitcom 'Artists Of Life'. Like the pilot you can read the whole script here or on my Movellas site. A list with all episodes, and free download links can be also found when you click on 'Artists of Life' tab here on my blog. New episodes will be released every second Sunday. Please don't change anything or distribute any of the scripts without my permission. Thanks. Please feel free to tell me your opinion on it.

And here is a new interview of me talking about what's gonna happen in the first few episodes.

Click on the picture to open PDF-file to read the interview.
If a link isn't working, please write me. Thanks.

Why do we dance?

Do you like to dance? I do, but I'm not a really good dancer. I just love music, I love to watch musicals, so I already look forward to the Tony Awards, my favorite of all award shows. I mostly enjoy the opening numbers and knowing that this year's host is gonna be Neil Patrick Harris again will make it one more time legen-wait for it-dary. He can not only act, but is also an amazing singer and dancer.

Dancing is a good way to express your feelings, to show them. There are slow and fast dances, you can dance to almost all kind of music. Some dances are part of a culture, like in Latin America the Salsa or Rumba. People all over the world dance these dances, and of course there are many more.

Years ago the girls danced to impress the men, to entertain them. Now even men love to dance. And some are pretty good. I am very impressed by these shadow dancers. They don't sing like in a musical, they don't need words to tell a story, they simply dance.

As much as I love watching people dancing, I am not a big fan of dancing shows on Tv actually. But like I already tweeted there is a new dancing show in Germany called "Got to Dance" in which they are looking for the best dancers, single dancers or whole dancing crews. I'm very interested how this is gonna be. The original of the show is from the UK, and I already watched a few videos on youtube. I so enjoyed and simply love Ruff Diamond - their performances are just amazing!!!

So since I saw the promotional trailer of the German "Got To Dance" version, which included a scene from the Big Bang Theory flash mob last year and I was like - was that Melissa Rauch?? - I googled the trailer, watched it again and am now waiting when that show starts Thursday June 20 on Pro7 and Friday June 21 on Sat1.

In this trailer there is the question like the title of this blog post: Why do we dance?
Why do you dance? Do you love to dance?

I do. Whenever I feel lonely, or upset, I listen to music and it helps me to feel better and to rethink everything. Music often inspires me, helps me to see things differently. Dancing is also a good way to release fears, pressure and anger. Dancing can improve your self-confidence. People who wanna do something healthy but don't like sports much, they should think about dancing. You don't have to be a professional dancer, you just do it for fun. Just like Kaley Cuoco who convinced the cast and crew of the CBS hit comedy to do a flash mob.

We dance because we are born to. We dance because it makes fun, because we can bond with each other, we can do something together, be part of a crew and feel connected. We can show our emotions, and don't need words to communicate. We see people dancing and understand it, no matter which language we speak.

Way to happiness

What happened? What am I doing here? I open my eyes, but it's like they are still closed. I can't see anything. Am I blind? Is it dark? I start thinking. What is the last thing I remember? How do I come here? Where am I? I can only feel the floor, it feels like stones, ice cold. I try to get up, try to get on my feet. I have to get out of here. I touch the wall and I start to walk. I want to leave the darkness, I want to see. I want to hear something, I want to feel something that is not cold. I walk, and I think of my goal.

I walk and walk and walk. I am exhausted, I can barely breathe. Where am I? How do I get out of here? I finally wanna see again. I wanna hear something. I wanna feel something that is not lifeless and cold. Having that wish is what keeps me walking. I won't give up. It's my dream. A simple one. I don't wish for a pot of gold or the crap most people are looking for these days. Who cares about fame? Someone can be successful today, and a beggar tomorrow. Money means nothing. It might be not as cold as these stones on here, but as lifeless. Not many guys understand what's really important. I am looking for that. I look for happiness.

I have a dream. Yes, I dare to still have a dream. Mostly live their lives the way they were taught to. But who wants to live a life of someone else? When I'll be a Grandma one day, I will tell my kids about my life, what I have done, and not what others told me to do. No, I don't know where I am, I only know where I want to be. Out of the dark. I wanna see the light. My life has to have a sense. Where is it? Where can I find it? I keep walking. I don't know if it's the right direction, but it feels right in that moment. A voice within is telling me keep going.

The Eiffel Tower in Paris is for many people a symbol of love
picture by D. Sharon Pruitt

And then, suddenly it happens. What is this? It's beautiful. I feel like an insect flying to something sparkling. The first thing I can see. I am not blind. It gets brighter and I feel something. A tingling in my stomach. I get excited. The closer I go, the brighter and warmer it becomes. I do not only see again, I also feel again. I know the goal is near, I am almost there. The long walk, the cold, the darkness, it's all over. I don't know what's gonna happen, I can't describe what I see but it's the most beautiful I've ever seen.

I see colors, all the colors of the rainbow. It is warm, I can feel it on my skin. The dark and grey fade away. I can hear birds singing, I can hear the trees rustinling in the wind. I can see the blue sky, I feel the sun rays embracing my whole body. I reached my goal. Some might have stopped, lost their faith on their ways, but I had a dream. And now I found what I was looking for. The place where I am safe. I found you.

I look at you, and you look at me. Smiling happily. You just stand there, don't say a word. But you don't need to. Words are a bad way to use for communication, it often leads to misunderstandings. You are like my mirror, when I look at you I see me, only clearer and brighter and happier. You are the other half of me, you let me see, hear, and most important feel. I feel free, I feel safe, I feel me. I finally arrived. I am at home in this beautiful place, your heart.


It was Justin Timberlake's song "Mirrors" that inspired me writing this short story. It's a beautiful song about finding love, the one and only we are all looking for. The one person that understands you without words, that shows you the beauty of life that you was unable to see before. Love is what keeps us alive, and statistics say people who live in a happy relationship live longer and get less sick. I guess when I keep walking I'm gonna find this beautiful place, home, one day. I do believe in true love and the power that it has and gives you. 

Do you believe in true love? Have you found your true love? What is love for you? Do you think you just feel when the right person is next to you?

Living on the pink side

Every girl loves pink. Is it a stereotype or really true? When a woman gives birth to a baby girl most of the presents and congratulation cards are in pink. The girl gets pink dresses, skirts, ribbons, plush toys and so on. Girls live in a pink room, sleep in a pink bed. Okay, not all of them, and luckily I had a white room without any pink when I was a kid. But why is pink the girl color? Why is the first thing we think of when we hear the word pink little girl's stuff? Okay some might think of the singer, but for the most I guess it's girl's stuff.

The meaning of the color pink is unconditional love and nurturing.

There are so many colors which are all neither male nor female, except light blue for boys and pink for girls. When you go to a toy store and look for girl's stuff, you get a pink shock: everywhere you look it's all pink. Mostly Barbie dolls. But why do girls love Barbie? Almost every little girl plays with that doll. I was one of them who couldn't have enough. And girls do not only want the dolls; they also want the dresses, cars, houses, horses. Barbie has everything, a beautiful, perfect life in a pink girl's bubble.

Is pink a typical girl color?
picture by tanakawho

What would a girl do if she could be one of Barbie's friends and live with her on the pink side? Such a dream can come true in the Dreamhouse which is permanently in Sunrise, Florida, but also touring through Europe. This week Barbie Dreamhouse opened in German capital Berlin and will remain until August 25. But not everyone loves this pink dream. Some protested against the house, against Barbie. According to them the doll is the reason why many girl's don't like their bodies and have an unhealthy beauty obsession. 

“Fewer and fewer girls feel comfortable in their own skin, with eating disorders having increased drastically because of figures like Barbie,” Stevie Schmiedel from the “Pink Stinks” Initiative said as quoted by SAPA.

But is it only that doll that let girls think they only have to look good to become popular and special? Is it only that doll that shows them to be extra thin? I doubt that. It's also the whole Hollywood life shown on TV that gives the impression of size 0 is a good thing. Celebrities have to look just perfect, but even they only look 'perfect' thanks to Photoshop. So is it really the doll which created the picture of a little girl who likes everything pink? Can it be blamed for the whole thing? Why do girls admire Barbie? Because of her look? Because of everything is pink?

Back in the 1920s pink was a male color due to its close associations with red. Until the 1940s blue was seen more dainty and so the girls color. But then it changed. Since then the color pink represents compassion, nurturing and love. It relates to unconditional love and understanding, and the giving and receiving of nurturing.

Do you think pink is a girl color or is it mostly because of Barbie? Do girls really like that color or did they just get used to it because their parents gave them many pink stuff and so even later they feel more comfortable with everything pink? And do girls really wanna look like Barbie? Does she represent all the typical girl stereotypes?

Video from Barbie Life in a Dreamhouse

Sources: 

Full definition of the color pink: http://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/color-pink.html

More on the Barbie Dreamhouse: http://barbiedreamhouse.com/

Watch a video of the Barbie Dreamhouse in Sunrise, Fla: http://www.wsvn.com/news/articles/local/21010592065957/barbie-dreamhouse-experience-opens-at-sawgrass/#ixzz2TBQrELqO

Happy Mother's Day

She is the first woman in your life and the most important. She raised you, took care of you, she comforted you when you were sad. She encouraged you when something didn't work the first time. You always knew that you can talk to her about everything - your mother. Today is her day, Mother's day. It's the day to say thank you. Thank you Mom, for everything you've done and still do, for all your infinite love.

pic by D. Sharon Pruitt 

My Mom gave up her job back then to raise my brother and me. She was always there for us and still is. She told me stories, read from lots of children books, she played with me, taught me to cook. She taught me about life, to be who I am. No matter how tough times were, she supported me, encouraged me not to give up, pursue my dreams. I learned that not every mistake is bad, but that every mistake I make is my teacher, so I learn, it lets me grow and makes me stronger. I learned that some things that look bad at first, don't have to be that bad. Everything has two sides. So many things are not only black or white, yes or no.

I am happy that I have such a wonderful Mom. I know she is still there for me all the time. I can talk to her about everything, she will listen and she does care. I can't imagine to not have her in my life. When I went to elementary school, I had a school mate who lost his Mom at the age of 8. It's hard to lose someone you love, someone so close, to lose a parent, but I guess it's even harder for such a young kid. It can happen in the blink of an eye, so since then I appreciate even more that I still have both parents, my Mom and my Dad, who both love and support me and are there for me all the time. 

So today I say "Thank you Mom, I would not be who I am now without you. I am happy to have you, you are wonderful and simply the best."

Today my whole family will meet and we're gonna have dinner all together. These times are rare, and I love these family times. These are the best times, I love to chat with them, to see them laugh, to simply have a good time.

some little gifts to say Thank you Mom
pic by D. Sharon Pruitt

How do you celebrate Mother's Day? How do you say thank you to your Mom?

Life on the fast lane

When I look back at my childhood I remember having a pen pal living in Eureka, California and an other one living in Scotland. I wrote them letters by hand, not on the computer, and I sent them by mail. It took a while till their letters reached me, but I had something to look forward to. Waiting for an answer, what might be in the letter? What will she tell me? I was excited and when the letter finally arrived, I opened and read it, and reread it. But what happened to that? People send emails and texts, they don't have to wait for an answer that long. Once they sent a message, a few seconds later their phone blinks or makes a sound, and ta-dah there is the reply.

These days everything is fast, you have no time to rest, and no time to waste. We are all busy and we are always a step ahead. Yesterday at college our lecturer told us, that we can only do something well when we are completely present and aware of what we're doing in that very moment. Only when we pay full attention to it, we can reach the best results. But the problem is, as I said, we're mostly a step ahead. He explained it that normally when we sit we should just sit, when we stand we should stand and when we walk we should walk. But how is it really? When we sit we already think about standing and when we stand we already think where to go.

spend some time with your friends and family
picture by D. Sharon Pruitt

Many people don't allow themselves taking some time, they say: we don't have time for this, no time for that, they are all in a hurry all the time. Everything has to be fast. Sending a letter is for many people a waste of time, because till it arrives and till they get the reply, well that all simply needs too much time. So they grab their phones, type just a few words, but don't waste time writing full sentences or even complete words, and click the "send" button. But by doing that, they already think about the next message they have to send, then the meeting with the boss, then the birthday party of their kid. They are always a step ahead.

Working and doing stuff is great, but imagine a world without waiting. Would it be really that great like many guys think? Is it important that everything is that fast? Is waiting really that bad? When you're waiting till a good book will be released, waiting for a new song to come out, waiting for the new episode of your favorite TV show, waiting for the letter or a phone call or meeting your best friend or relatives again who you haven't seen in a while. Isn't it great when you can take time and wait for something to happen? I guess for soon-to-be parents pregnancy is something very special, when they wait for their kid to fulfill their lives. Imagine there would be a app for your phone and you click on it and ta-dah, your baby is there. As much as you want to meet her, see her and hold her in your arms, you also want to wait, because waiting is part of the whole beautiful experience. 

And isn't it the waiting that makes so many things just easier? I just recently read "The Little Prince" and if you haven't you should do it. There is so much truth in it, and in my next posts I will write about them. When the little Prince meets the fox, it told him that it wants to be tamed because only then, when the Prince takes his time to tame the fox, it will be important to the Prince and the Prince will be important to the fox. Otherwise the Prince will just be one of many princes and the fox only one of many foxes - the time we spend with someone makes this someone special to us. But people have no time to meet new people, to get to know new things. They want everything fast, they buy online instead of going to a mall, they buy instant meals instead of cooking for themselves. But they can't just buy friends, because a good, deep and long-lasting friendship needs time, so many people don't really have friends.

Tame an animal and it won't be just an animal, but a friend
pic by D. Sharon Pruitt

It's even more impressive to read the "The Little Prince", because it was written in the 1940s and it's still relevant. People are busy at work, busy all the time, in a hurry, always a step ahead. But you live right here, right now, so take some of your time to rest, to spend it with your family and friends. Get to know new stuff, new people, don't be in a hurry all the time. Have no time for being in a hurry. Take time to be there for the people you love, and when you're with them, don't think about your next appointment or your job. 

And when you know you will meet someone at a special time, then you can wait for that moment to come. And you will extend your happiness while waiting.

Goodbye Privacy

Imagine you sit in a coffee shop and then you see this amazing guy. What do you do? Check Facebook if you find him and some information about him? Or do you even just use a simple app and write something on his own Facebook page, so he might notice you? This is possible if you use an open WiFi hotspot like the one in the coffee shop for surfing the internet. You only need a special app on your phone and then you can post something on someone else's site in her name. You can also read her emails or fill her shopping cart while she's shopping on Amazon.

We wanna look closely, but what do we expect to see?
pic by Beverly & Pack

The development is vast. But as good as technology is right now, there are also many risks. Just last week, while I was watching Modern Family, I thought of that again. They wanted to sell a house to a special customer and because no other guy was interested, they used all kinda social media sites to figure out what he likes and what not, that they can decorate the house just the way he wants it. But at the end, Cameron talks about the dog door they made, and he said that it would be perfect for his dog Otis. So that confused the guy: total strangers know that he has a dog named Otis.

How would you feel in such a situation? Someone you never saw and met before knows everything about you. That's the price a celebrity has to pay. She is followed everywhere she goes, and then there are pics of her on the internet, pics she's not even aware of were taken and published. And people come to her, kissing and hugging her, talking like they would know her for years. Some "fans" follow their stars to get closer to them, they wanna know everything. But imagine someone follows you and no matter where you go, you can't be sure who's watching you. Scary, isn't it?

Some people post everything on Facebook. Last week I talked to a friend that maybe in 50 years our grandchildren can read what we did these days. Like my grandchild will come to me, say: Granny, 50 years ago, you were in that coffee shop with this handsome man, remember? And I will just look at my sweetie kid, wondering if I ever told her about it. My friend said till then Facebook won't exist anymore, but I said that all the information won't be lost, they will still be on the internet, because what once was there, will never be deleted.

But why is it important to many guys to tell everyone every little detail like where they are? They write now I'm with Max and Milly at McDonald's, two hours later, the three are at Burger King, then Starbucks, or whereever, and some guys even post when they do their business in the bathroom. 50 years later his grandchild might be asking: were you successful? and he will probably just be confused.

is the next step that we all have a QR code and people can come with their phones, scan your code and know everything about you?
pic by Richard Cabrera

When last year college started and I added a few of my fellow students on Facebook, one was pretty scared when I knew her middle name and birthday. She was shocked, asked me how I know these things, coz it was our first week at college and she didn't tell me, and then I said it's on your Facebook page. So many guys are not aware that they put all these information about themselves on the internet. We become more and more like a glass. It scares us that total strangers know everything about us, but we make this possible. That's why I don't put too private things on the internet and why I don't use open WiFi hotspots. I don't want people to fill my Amazon cart with 5 TV sets, and then when I place my order I bought not only a book and a game, but also these 5 TV sets.

Now you say okay it's kinda scary when people know stuff about me, but I like to know stuff about new people, to figure out if I can like him or not. So when I meet someone I google him and try to figure out what he is like, to know the people he spend time with, and so on. Then I can decide if I really wanna know him in real life or not. It's just to make sure that he's not dangerous or something. But some years ago this wasn't possible, and isn't it better to get in touch with the real person and not her virtual accounts? I love to get in touch with people using the internet, but I still prefer to meet people in real life, that's how you really get to know someone.

Back in the coffee shop this man walks to me, tells me stuff about my family, knows my brother's name, where I live, knows my friends, where I love to be, what I love to watch and what music I like. It's like he knows everything about me, though I never met him before. No, you don't have to be a star anymore to be in such a situation. Luckily this didn't really happen to me, but thinking about it makes me shiver.

The amazing Garfunkel & Oates have a song called Google, singing about using the internet to find out as much as possible about someone:

Do you use Google to find out something about a person you just met? What information do you share on social media sites?

Heading Home

It was a long way, not always easy to get there. I felt cold, I felt warmth, I saw the sun, and I saw the moon. I met people, so many. Some of them were dancing, some were singing, some were acting, writing, painting. I met people who smiled, people who cried, people who suffered. It wasn’t always easy, but it was important. I needed it all. Because they are all part of my experience, part of me. What would I be, how would I be, if some things didn’t happen the way they did? What if I wouldn’t have met some people? Would I still be the same person I am right now?

There’s no doubt that I made the right choice, not always in my life, but most of it. There are things I regret, but the really important decisions, well, they weren’t wrong. One of them was starting to write again. I did this all my life, and when I was writing my play “Like A Fairytale” in 2006, I remember my Mom saying: “Do something useful, do the household or help gardening.” My Dad was fine with it, he just let me write, because he knew that I liked it. I still do, and he still knows, and now also my Mom does. So the decision I made, to start this blog one year ago, was good for me. I could write, not only stories, I could write about things that were just going on in my mind. And I could get in touch with new people, people who let me know their opinion, people who inspire me because they also write about interesting stuff.

What and who is in our heart?
picture by Barbara Unterberger

One year ago I wrote about my Granny, and because Easter is not far away anymore I wanna write about her again. I still miss her. She died in the year 2000, 2 days after her birthday. She was very weak on her final days, and she had to leave this world just way too soon. She was caring a lot, she had the greatest heart a person could have, she loved music, she had the melody in her heart. And she was strong. He had cancer, and the doctors gave her only a few months after the diagnosis, but she lived 10 more years. She was a fighter, and she didn’t want anyone to be sorry for her or to treat her differently. She doesn’t want her family, us, to suffer, too. She kept saying that she was okay. She was smiling, she was enjoying every single day of her life.

The day when my Dad told me, he had to go and drive to my Granny, I knew that she passed. I just nodded, tried to distract myself by watching some TV and keeping an eye on my little brother. My Mom told me later a story about her Mom, when she was a little kid and her Dad was in the Second World War, and the whole family just wanted to have him back. One day my Granny as a little girl was setting the dinner table with her brothers and sisters, as they all heard someone coming upstairs. They knew it was him, they were all so happy to see their Dad again. My Granny opened the door, but no one was there. About 2 weeks later they got a letter that he died.

I thought about this story a lot. Why did they all hear him? I think he came home, and everyone could feel him. I remembered how I had the feeling that my Granny was in my room with me, shortly after she died, and when I looked to the corner where I felt she was standing, I couldn’t see anything. I just believe that heaven is not a place high above, it’s when the soul can go home and continue living in the hearts of the people she loved. My Granny’s Dad came back, they all felt it, and my Granny is still with me. As long as I keep her in my heart she will never die completely. I guess she knew that, before she died. She knew the time would come, she knew her time is limited. Back then I thought she must be acting, but now I am sure that she was actually happy. Not because she died that young, but because she lived 10 years with this cancer. She had these 10 years, she had more time than the doctors predicted. She could spend more time with her family, and that’s the most important thing.

Two hearts belong together forever
picture by db Photography - Demi Brooke

We all have a limited time, it’s not always easy, there are not only easy choices to make, but it’s our journey, our path that we are going. It’s on us, if we waste our life, or if we do what we like, what we love, if we spend our time with the ones we love. Yes, I will keep on writing, this blog was good for me and still is. The first year is over, but that’s just the start. And maybe one day, when I have to leave this world, my kids, or my grandchildren can read all these things on this blog, because all the posts will remain forever. And maybe this will help them to realize that they are not alone, and even if someone they loved died, it doesn’t mean she's gone forever, because what really makes us happy, is to come home, to be home. And as long as you don’t forget her, you will feel that she is still with you and never has left you. The really important things can only be seen with your heart.

Happy Birthday Jim

As you might know from my Surprise,Surprise blog post I collected birthday greetings for Jim. Fans from all over the world like Peru, Mexico, Spain, Italy, France, Germany, Brazil and some more countries sent me messages, pictures or video greetings. Once again I’d like to say thank you for everyone who’s part of this. I added them all to the letter, and I also made a video with the pictures, videos and the shorter messages (the longer ones are simply too much to read for a video, so they are only in the letter). You can watch it here, or go to youtube.

Some of you maybe know that Jim wants to learn French, and that’s why I add a video of my fave French singer Emmanuel Moire to this post. I love his song “Ca me fait du bien” since I firstly heard it in 2007. Back then I listened to lots of French music, and watched some movies and it helped me a lot to learn the language better – and to go to Strasbourg and order some “tarte flambée” (you should really eat that when you are there ;-)). For those who doesn’t know much French, in “Ca me fait du bien” Moire sings that he wrote a letter to his love, he hopes that he will come back to him. Everywhere he goes, it all reminds him of his love, but he needs that to be happy, to feel good. When he hears their song, he thinks about their love, their time together. All he wants is his love to come back, because he misses him so much, and he would love to have a chance to, at least talk to him one last time. But even if he won’t come back, it would be okay for him, if that is what makes him happy. He only wants him to be happy and he can only be happy when he is happy. So the last thing he does, is writing a letter.

It’s a very beautiful song about love, I do not only love it because of its beautiful lyrics, but I also love the melody, Emmanuel Moire’s piano playing and voice. I could listen to all his songs the whole day, and I’m glad that he will release his 3^rd album this year!!

But back to another part of the surprise for Jim: Kayla and Vicky also did an eCard and collected some more birthday greetings for Jim. Just click on the picture below and read the eCard. 

Some girls from Latin America also made a video for Jim. Watch it here:

So once again: 

Happy Birthday, Jim!!!

I speak for everyone now, who’s part of this little surprise: we hope you’ll see and read this, and that you like it. Have a wonderful day with your family, may all your wishes come true, and stay this wonderful person.

BTW: Just because I mentioned it in the Surprise Surprise post: I am still working on the Funny News Show I wrote as another part of the surprise for Jim which included only things he likes (based on what he told in various interviews), but because of some problems, I wasn’t able to finish it in time. Thanks to Chriselle Almeida and Letícia Bricio for helping me so much with this so far. I will put it on youtube as soon as it is finished ;)