Friday, March 30, 2012

My theory about likability

We met and meet so many guys in our lives and most of all it depends on a very few seconds if we really like someone or not. But what are the main points why we think we like someone? Does it depend on how he or she is dressed, talks, the way of movement, the gestures? What is it actually? And why do we sometimes need more time to like someone? And can we like a guy who is totally different than the other kinds we usually like?

We mostly like guys who are happy, friendly, nice, enjoy their lives, having aims in life and have personality. Happy people are always more wanted than depressive ones. We want someone who looks like being someone special because in our life it is mostly about what something looks like. The eyes are the greatest liars, they can be manipulated so easily, but we mostly believe in them.

Imagine you see someone and you don’t know what people like about him. That’s what I asked myself after I saw Sheldon the first time. I thought, that he is probably the most awkward guy in the world and then I saw videos on youtube on which people go crazy when they saw Jim. I honestly don’t know if they would know a 'real' Sheldon personally, if they would react about him the same way. I guess he would drive them as crazy as Leonard, Howard, Raj and Penny.
So why do they love him? Do they love him because of Jim? Or do they love Jim because of Sheldon?

My first thought was that Sheldon is a grown-up man but in his mind he’s more a child. So I pondered over that maybe they feel like they want to protect him from this cold, cruel and dark world outside, because he always believes in the good in people which is not that bad, but sometimes you have to ask questions to yourself and you have to be aware. In this world happens so much in only a second - it’s better not to think about it.
My second thought then was that this maybe could be for mothers but not for men, other boys or girls. I guess all these guys like him because he is who he is. He doesn’t change for anybody and that’s appreciated. We all have to fit into a world. We want that people around us only see the good things about us, we want to be liked by everyone. When we were a child we were who we are because we knew no matter what we do, the most important persons in our live will love us anyway: our parents. But the older we become, the more we learn to act. We learn to behave, we learn that sometimes we need to lie when we don’t wanna hurt someone or just for our self-protection. We want to be perfect. We could see this best on Desperate Housewives and mostly on Bree who pretends to be Mrs Perfect but when you look close, she’s is the most desperate and non-perfection of all.

We are actors in our live but we were never asked if we wanted to act. Some couldn’t handle it and got lost in their own acting. They pretended too much and lost their selves. People want to be like Sheldon, they want to be their selves and not caring too much what all the others think about. Why don’t we stop acting, stop pretending to be perfect? Why do we always want to fit into something? The people who really like us, like us the way we are and not what we pretend to be.
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