Things I never did...

... will always remain things I never really knew.

Do you have New Year's resolutions? I do. And there was only one I had for 2012 and didn't do, and that will be the one that I'll definitely do as soon as possible. A new year is often seen as a new chance to change things, some see it as some kind of motivation. People wanna do more sports or quit smoking. I guess these two are the all time faves of many people. And I should do more sports, too, so it's also one of my plans for next year.

But there is so much more out there. Why not trying something completely new? There is a world out there, offering so much, way more than we are aware of. So much stuff that I haven't dared to do, like bungee jumping, because I'm just too scared. I have acrophobia, not when I'm on a plane, or I feel safe like standing on a high building with a secure handrail, but when I don't feel safe, ohh my. This is why I can't spend a night in a tree house, or walk on a pendant bridge. And the next thing why I'll probably not do bungee jump would be the free fall, to lose the ground and just fall. And hoping that the rope won't break. But I guess if I could overcome my fear, I might like it, but if I don't try I'll never know for sure.

So that's one of my resolutions: overcome my fears. Fears are good to have and they keep us from doing mistakes or something we might regret one day, but it also feels good after you did something the first time. It made you proud, proud of yourself that you made it. I don't say you all should go bungee jumping, but thinking of something you never did and just do it. There are so many things out there. Maybe you read about something you never heard of before, or someone told you about it - it's always best to do something with your partner or a friend. Be curious, don't only do things you used to do all your life, try something new. Maybe you think you don't like it, maybe you are afraid to fail, to lose your stability, to come out of your comfort zone, but it's worth a try.

New Year gives the chance to change something. To have the will to do it. One of my fave quotes this year was from the sitcom Ben and Kate. I also tweeted that in November because it is so true:

"You need to go out there and try stuff. And don't worry about not succeeding because trying is succeeding."

I had a really great 2012, and I hope you also have great memories. I still can't believe that it's already over, because it seems to me it just started. I thank you all for stopping by, commenting and sharing some of your time reading my posts. This means a lot to me!!! And no matter if you have New Year's Resolutions or not, I wish you all a wonderful 2013!!!

As this is the last post in my first blogging year, I'd like to share with you my fave song from the musical Sister Act which I watched last Saturday and absolutely loved it. When I was looking for just the song on youtube yesterday, I found that someone filmed that scene. Great voices and wonderful lyrics.

Happy 2013 my Blogger friends!!!!

Welcome new world

Imagine you waited for something and then nothing happened at all. People told you so many things and you were excited, though you were also quite sure that it's more like a fairytale than an actual 'thing'. Anyway, so many talked about it. It was in the newspaper, in magazines, on the TV and radio. Some guys even did a movie about it. So you were waiting, till that day. The big day. Everything will change, nothing will be what it was.

The day is today. But what has changed? When I look outside my window all seems pretty normal. It's cloudy and it rains a bit, but that's all. No flood or storm that is taking everything away. No burning sky. Nothing. Just another day. So what had happened? What was the big change? What did some people expect to happen?

I am not a scientist, though I'm very interested in it, and I never believed in the story. Why should this be the end of the world, of our existence? Only because the Mayan calendar ended today? So this is it: the Mayan Apocalypse. The big end of the world we know. Everyone seemed to be afraid, counting down the days, but it was more or less just like a show. Because people bought tons of Christmas presents, spent lots of money anyway.  And if today would be the last day, we would not have another Christmas anymore. So I guess not really lots of people believed in this.
Maybe it was only something to talk about, a topic for everyone. I mean we all live on this planet, so when it will disappear, we all will disappear, too.

You don't have to be a scientist to know that it's illogical. Why would the world end from one day to the next? Did some people expect another big bang or something? Or are we now just in another universe, or does everything still looks the same but it's not? Is this the end of people fighting against each other, of all the bad stuff that happened? Is it the end of politicians who stop talking and finally start doing something?


Do we want a change? Yes. Do we need it? Yes. Many people realized that. It only makes me sad, that something so bad had to happen. But that change, thinking differently about guns and weapons, started last week. It had nothing to do with the Mayans. Life is what makes, inspires us and let us think differently, and not a calendar. No end can be predicted. And we would be way more frightened when this would be possible. We have to enjoy our life, learn from the mistakes we made. That's how we change. In fact every day is a new chance for a change. Every day can be a new start. The end is not here, but the beginning is. As often as people talked about the apocalypse, it never happened. It can only be predicted in a movie, but we're not in a movie.

Nothing has changed. Today is just another day, another day closer to Christmas. Another beginning. We celebrate Jesus' birth. Then there will be a new year, another start. So when one day passed by, the next will come. That's the only thing we know for sure. And the apocalypse? Well, the end never comes alone, it's always followed by the beginning. So maybe it is today, but when it is, it will also be tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. Just imagine there is an apocalypse, but nobody notices.

Award for best movie

A new start is something special and important. It's like a new life. When I finally decided to go to college and stop working, it was a big step, but on the first day everything became real. Unbelievable that I already passed one semester, because it still feels like I've just started. Last Tuesday was the big day for 140 new students at our college which is still expanding. That's very cool because you really learn a lot, meet interesting people, can go to various events, and the lecturers work in several media companies, so they haven't their knowledge from books only but mostly from life.

As I already wrote about on this blog, I did a radio contribution about the gothic scene, for which we did an interview with a shop assistant of a gothic shop, how she started to get interested in that scene, and which stereotypes still exists and which ones are true or false. This was really interesting, and honestly I never thought this much about a scene, but it all gave me a new point of view on it.

We also did a video contribution about Trigema, which is a very huge and popular German textile company. They produce clothes like t-shirts and pants in Germany and deliver it worldwide. The head of the company is Wolfgang Grupp who says that people need work for earning money. Without having money, they couldn't buy anything, and when nothing can be bought there won't be a working place. So it's important to him to give people work who live next to the company and don't outsource the production only to save money. He really takes care of his co-workers, because he says that he simply needs them. He knows that without them he would be nothing and also the company. Everyone is part of the family. And that's why he also invites his about 1,200 employees to his birthday parties or makes big events for the staff. He also honors some of his employees when they did something extraordinary or are in the company for a long time, like 10 years or even longer.

Chris, me, Jess, and Wolfgang Grupp

I think it's a good thing and I know not every boss is like that. He also has not his own office, he works directly with his employees in the same room and he hopes that one day his two kids will take over the company. The parents should be the role model for their kids, and they should look up to them, so he says. When we met him for doing that short film about him, his vision, and Trigema, we could recognize that he does not only say that, he really does it. He is nice, friendly, and caring. You can feel his ambition, his passion that he has for the work he's doing, and he likes to share his success.

It's indeed a good think when you get honored for the things you do. I mean you do it because you enjoy it. Work should not only be for the money, you should feel happy to have that job. And it is a motivation when even once a year the employees get rewarded. Why only actors or singers? I'm really happy that the college I go to gave my group and me an award for the best movie. I don't wanna brag about that, I mean it's neither an Emmy nor a Oscar or anything compared to that, but it makes us all very happy. It is simply great when your work gets noticed. So thanks!!!!

It's just the beginning, and I can't wait for the next semesters. It's like our professor who run the college said on Tuesday to the freshmen:  we do not only plan events, we live events. Exams are events, and every lecture is. Life is an event, you can't predict it exactly but you can plan it as best as you can to make it as close to your dreams and imaginations as possible. Grab for the stars, because the sky is not the limit.
So I wish the newbies all the best for their student days. You can really learn a lot. And even though I don't earn money anymore, I do not regret it that I stopped working. Because meeting so many great and inspiring people, and making lots of experiences can't be bought with any money. What you learn is not just knowledge, it's more precious than anything else, and it will never lose its worth - like money.

So, if you understand German, you can watch here the short film we did about Wolfgang Grupp and Trigema.

My first interview

This time I'll keep it very short. It's probably the most personal thing I've ever done. You might know that I study Media Management and that it's part of my studies to write articles for magazines, to design them and also to do interviews, photos and so on. So as my studies will continue in 2 weeks, I thought why not doing an interview with me? It was a good practice for me and another chance to write what's on my mind. I struggled a bit but in the end, but then I thought why not putting it on my blog?

The interview is about when I started to write, how I came back after some years of not writing at all, when I realized what I missed all the time, how much it helped me, what inspires me, what I like about TV shows, plays and movies, and why the internet is so important these days. So if you want to, feel free to click here to open the PDF and read my first interview.

Best example for never giving up

You have goals in life? That is good because you need them, to encourage you reaching something in your life. You don’t wanna say, when you have to leave these amazing world one day, that you haven’t done everything what you wanted to, do you? Goals are important, you should always have some and fight for it. Never give up. It is never easy, so many obstacles come up all along the way. But it is like a computer game you want to finish: you wanna accomplish the mission as best as you can that you can go forward in the game.

The real life is not different, except that you sometimes get lazy and tired of working because you think you always fail, and so you reach a point and just stop. When everything went wrong, you don’t see any future. But maybe you have to look differently at it and if you look closer you will find another way for reaching your goal and making your dreams come true. There is never just one way and one right solution. It is not maths, it’s not an equation - life is life and much more complicated than simply putting it into numbers.

Think about it as a picture you wanna draw: you can use different pencils, different ways to draw it and different colors. One picture can show the same thing but it will always look differently. When you write an exam at school or a story about a chosen topic and some other guy has the same job to do, well, the result won’t be exactly the same.

Rare and special, like a dream: a double rainbow

Life can be hard but if it would be all so easy, you have to admit that, it would be boring. You would never play a video game, read a book or watch a movie or TV show without having a good story, would you? You need challenges because these make you stronger, let you learn new things, and in the end, when you are successful, everyone will be proud of you. Mostly you. The more challenges you have been faced with, the prouder will you be. Your dreams can come true.

The best example for never giving up - or a pretty good one - is the Big Bang Theory. You all know the show and how successful it is all over the world, but do you also know the start of it? The way it all began? The first pilot of 2006 had different characters like nowadays (Katie and Gilda), the set was more ‘dark’ than it is now and contained more sex talking. It was not successful at all, but Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady, the creators of the show, got a second chance and knew how to use it. The second pilot was not just good, it was awesome and caused a really big bang afterwards. But just after only 8 episodes there was the writer’s strike at the end of 2007 and therefore the show’s future was uncertain. So they had to break through another obstacle. They still haven’t given up and that’s why it was the first show on which was worked after the strike. They simply still believed in the show, believed in their dream, fought for it and, as you now know, it worked.

So if you believe, if you work hard and do the best you can, you will find a solution, you will find a way to reach your goals. It can be hard, but if you won’t fight, you have already lost and then you can only read: Game over.

Is life a child's play? A girl's talk

Two 15 year old girls sitting at one table. Binah is from Africa and Lucy from America. They meet each other the very first time and have a conversation.

Binah: You have such a good life. You can go to school and learn. And after school you can work, you can earn your own money.
Lucy: Yes, but we have to get up early in the morning. And believe me, school isn’t a walk in the park. You have to learn a lot, people expect too much knowledge these days.
Binah: But it’s great to know so many things.
Lucy: When you need it in your life, sure it’s a good thing. But most things we learn at school is not useful. I mean why do I have to know what happened hundreds of years ago?
Binah: You know something about your ancestors, what they did is part of why your country is what it is, acts like it does in some situations, and have its laws to protect its people. I’d be happy if I would have the chance to know something about my past, that of my family or country. Why haven’t we developed like you Americans? Why are we still so poor?
Lucy: We aren’t rich either. I mean, when I switch on the TV I see these glamorous high school girls, wearing Gucci or Prada or whatever. I can’t afford these things. And I guess I won’t get a car for my 16th birthday.
Binah: Why do you need a car, or these Gucci or Prada, whatever this is? You have food. You can go and buy something to eat and drink, as much and whenever you like. And you have a safe home, you have your own bed.
Lucy: Yes, but that’s normal. Rich are people who live in villas, having a pool, a big park, lots of cars. What you see when you watch TV. Everyone wants to go to Hollywood and have that beautiful life.
Binah: I’ve never heard of Hollywood. And I don’t even have a TV.
Lucy: So you sit on your computer? Or chat with your friends using your smartphone?
Binah: My what? I have none of these things. I wish I’d have a computer to chat with people all over the world, but I can’t.
Lucy: Seriously? But what do you do the whole day?
Binah: I take care of my younger brothers and sisters, I help my mom to clean the house, to cook. I help farming fruits and vegetables. I am working the whole day. I can only eat what we harvest. We try to sell some of them, but it’s not very much.

I’ll stop here and let you think about how the conversation could go on. What do you think, when is a person rich? What makes a person rich? I think we mostly don’t recognize what we have because we think it’s normal. I don’t think that we have to go to Africa to meet someone who have less than we have. When I first watched the sitcom ‘2 Broke Girls’ it lets me realize how fast we can be broke. In one city, like New York, do not only live people like Carrie Bradshaw. There are also people like Max Black. When she was the first time in Caroline’s former room, even the bath tub was something special, not to mention the turning shoe cabinet. But for Caroline it wasn’t special at all, as she grew up with things like that.

So when is a person actually rich? Does it only depend on money, or can a person with lots of good friends also be rich? I guess sometimes we should more appreciate the things we have instead of complaining about others who have more. No matter if they have more money or more friends. Things could be worse.

On which cloud are you?

Some years ago all people would have answered: on cloud nine. And if not, they at least wished to be there or go there again.

Well, I don’t have to mention that things have changed in the past years. There are so many clouds everywhere we go and look. And no, I don’t mean the clouds we see when we look at the sky, I mean cloud computing. The computer has clouds, the computer is the new heaven. We can save everything there, it is a cache on the Internet, so you can save all your data, music, letters or whatever, and reach the stuff with any device. Because it is all on the Internet and not on your home computer.

like the heaven is the internet full of clouds. everyone can reach the data from everywhere.

I have to say I use Google Docs for writing and saving my blog entries on the Internet until I publish them on my blog. But is this really safe? Sometimes I think about that. I mean, it is nothing important, just my thoughts about various things, and I would never save any real important information there like my bank account data. This is a good service, because nowadays we don’t just have one computer, we have lots of devices with which we can use the Internet, e.g. our smartphone.

Everywhere we go, we take our data with us, we show more and more of ourselves on the Internet, with the entire world. What a revolution. But we also should take good care of what’s really important, things we don’t wanna anyone else to see. Some publish too many pictures and stuff like that e.g. on Facebook, and don’t think about the consequences. I mean also all social media network sites like Facebook or Twitter, are clouds as well. Because you can upload pictures and save it on the Internet, so that everyone can see it. But keep in mind, the Internet is not a person. A person can forget, the Internet not. Once on the Internet, for ever and ever on the Internet.

Where home is

I have spent some time abroad, on Grand Canary, and I really enjoyed it. That's also the reason why I didn't blog that much within the last few weeks. For me it was the first time I spent on the island. The view from my room was amazing and I wished I could have taken it with me, but unfortunately it didn't fit into my suitcase :(
On the first day someone from the travel agency told us a bit about the Spanish island. I was mostly astonished about the fact that it hasn't rained since May last year. Where I live it's normal that it rains almost every week (not now, because I have at least taken the heat with me).

the view from my hotel room - could be worse, right? -kidding ;)

Every day was warm, and even it was sometimes a bit cloudy, it never rained and though it was windy at the beach, it had never been cold. The temperature was constantly about 85 degrees - so I was totally happy because I love it when it's warm and sunny like that. My family and I rented a car and explored the isle. We saw some harbors, cities, and lots of mountains. It was really impressive, and we also met lots of friendly people. I am not that person who finds it easily to just go to someone I've never met before and have a chat, but the few I spoke with, were very kind. Of course we spent a day at the beach, too. Not that many because I am very pale, and when there was one thing I didn't want to bring home was a sunburn. Luckily I didn't ;).

no it's not Egypt - it's Grand Canary - just a big sand box ;)

But for some reason, as much as I always look forward spending some time abroad, to sit on a plane (though I don't understand why so many people applaud after landing - I mean no one claps his/her hands after I've done my work well), and fly far away from home, I am also always happy when I am back home again. Mostly I'm already happy when we drive through the city I was born. But this time, it was the first that I felt nothing. When we sat on the bus back to the airport, it just felt for me like we're making another trip. And now, that I am home again, I felt like I haven't been abroad - though I have all the memories about what we did, what we saw.

like taken from a movie - the mountains of Grand Canary

Do you know what I mean? Maybe it was because it was only a week, maybe because it was the first time after 4 years that I saw a beach and palm trees again. Maybe I felt that it wasn't time to go back home. Can this be possible? Or that I feel that the place I was born is no longer my home? Can this change? I still live with my parents, and I wanna have my own place, but as I don't earn any money right now - but start to look for some writing jobs to get at least a bit money - I simply can't move. When I have finished my basic studies I hope I can do my internship semester somewhere within the US. I hope that I can convince my friend to go next year with me to Los Angeles, visting my relatives and finding out if I really can imagine living there.

Do you still feel at home where you was born or has this changed? Can the definition of home change? Is home always where you come from, or where you feel currently happy?
I guess it's the place where you love to be, spending most of your time, where you have your friends. I think as we all change, our safe place can change, too. I will never forget where I come from, and it could be that I will miss it once when I spent too much time far away. Of course I have my family here, and that will be hard when I can't see them daily anymore, but I guess I have reached a point in my life when I wanna start and live my own life.

The big difference

No, this blog post is not about the difference between man and woman. It's about two different worlds: reality and virtuality.

Some years ago we only had a real life. We met our friends in person and we talked to each other. But things have changed. Now we have a second life, too. A virtual life. We blog, we tweet, we write emails, we have friends on facebook and so on. Some guys even have more virtual than real friends and do only communicate with the computer or the smartphone. When the youth nowadays would be asked what can be used for communication, I guess the last thing they would mention would be the mouth. Instead of talking to each other, they send texts. I've watched a TV show about a family in which the mother sent texts to their children that they should come to the dinner table. Unbelievable, isn't it?

I have also read an article lately that showed that most young people speak in the short language like they use on Twitter. They mix the reality with the virtuality, and so they use words like lol or omg in their daily language. They also don't write whole sentences anymore and that is a big problem for school teachers when their students have to write essays. The beauty of the language will get lost when more and more children use the smartphones and start texting. The earlier they start the more they lose the ability to use the language correctly.

even when they sit together they prefer to communicate with their smartphones

We change. Every decade is different. And so the use of our language and the language itself will change, too. People these days speak differently than, let's say, about 50 years ago. The virtuality is for sure a world we can't live without and the technical development changed our life completely. But it's not only a good thing. When it goes on like this and people use such devices more and more, which I think will definitely be so, then this could, sooner or later, destroy our language. Or at least the language we now know.

I am really glad that I had no cellphone when I was eight. And I don't like it when the eight-year-old foster child of my aunt wants to play with the Gameboy all the time, or the Play Station or Wii or whatever. He also wants his own mobile, but my aunt don't want him to have one and I agree with her on that. At that age no one needs a phone. It's great that you can call your kids, ask where they are when they wanted to meet a friend and aren't back at the stipulated time or when they don't know their way home anymore. Then they can call you and so you can pick them up. It all has advantages and disadvantages.

I was also shocked when I heard about a 1 year old boy who could already handle his father's iPad better than him. For the kids these devices are their life, they would be nothing without their smartphone and without their tablet. They see it as a cool toy and because everyone has such a cool device, everyone thinks it's necessary to have one. I have to admit that I only have a smartphone, which I bought this year. I also have a netbook but I use it for writing only. It's for my college, to work and write. I hate it to read books on my smartphone, I still prefer a 'real' paper book. I also still love to write letters instead of emails - so call me old-fashioned. I don't like to write that much on my smartphone, so I only write short texts or some tweets with it. I guess I could live without my smartphone. I can even leave the house and not take it with me. It wouldn't be a big problem and I wouldn't miss anything, but I'll only do that when my friend or the one I am out with has a phone or I won't be out that long or when I'm not far away from home.

How do you prefer to communicate? What do you need your smartphone for? Do you think that writing in the short language will destroy our language we have now? Not in a blink of an eye of course, or do you think that our language will change anyway? Do you use these short expressions? When is the best age for a kid to get his or her first own device? And could you live without your smartphone?

What makes a good parent?

Last Saturday I celebrated my 24th birthday. And it was the first time I spent it with Ella, the cute little daughter of my best friend. Of course I have already seen her before, but on my last birthday, my friend Krissy was still pregnant. I was shopping with her not just once, to buy all the baby stuff. It's simply amazing that the little girl will already turn 1 year next month. Time is really rushing by. I never felt like that when I was a child - back then a year seemed to be endless.

kids need to be loved....

Ella was wished, but later. My friend wanted to go to college first and after that she wanted to have a baby. She felt too young and not really ready, but after she figured out she was pregnant, she knew that she wanted the child. I read so many discussions about when a life actually starts and for me an unborn baby is already alive, because he or she lives. And when you feel your baby moving in you, it is already a part of you that you don't wanna miss anymore. I think it doesn't depend on someone's age to get the fear doing something wrong. I think when you feel too young or say you first need to earn enough money to allow your child the best possible childhood, you are already caring, and that makes a good parent.

I heard so many people who said that they could never raise an adopted kid or have a foster child. Because they wouldn't feel connected to them. One friend of my mom also said, that she doesn't know about the parents and so doesn't know what the child will once be like. But seriously, do you know that about your own child? And isn't it the education, the way you raise your child, the way he or she becomes? I think DNA is just a base. It's like the stage in a theater and the education is the play.

...and wanna show their love

My aunt has three foster children and she loves them all like they would be her own kids. The parents of two of the kids, who are actual brother and sister, don't care about their kids. They haven't given them much food, so they were totally scraggy and are still much smaller than they are supposed to be. My aunt gave this kids a new chance to live. When they were asked if they wanna go back to their parents they said no. These days they don't even wanna have contact like telephone calls or writing  letters. I guess that is really sad, and why shouldn't there be a person who help these innocent kids? Don't they have a right to live?

I have often asked myself what actually makes a good parent? A good parent takes care of his or her child, gives him or her a place to live and share his or her love. Love is what keeps us alive. If a mom doesn't feel ready and think she couldn't raise the baby and give it a good childhood - whatever the reason for that would be - and so she gives away her baby, I think that makes a good mom. Better than keeping the baby and let him or her suffer by not giving them anything to eat and drink. Someone who has the chance to raise a baby, and give this given-away baby a new chance to live and a new home, isn't that a good mom, too?

I also think that gay people can be good parents. It might be a little bit strange for most people, because it's simply not that common yet, but as long as they are caring. Why not? After I have seen Neil Patrick Harris on Kelly Ripa last month I believe that he and David are good fathers. They really love their twins and spending time with them. They can't have their own children, and I know that there are lots of couples, not only gay couples, who can't have own kids either, so an adoption is the only possible way for them to raise a baby.

DNA is not the only connection. The biggest connection is love. Everyone has love to give. And wouldn't it be a good feeling if you would know you helped a person? This little girl or boy wouldn't be able to live without you, or not that well? Wouldn't it be as you would have given this person a life? What makes a good parent for you?

Independent liberty

Today is the 4th of July - Independence Day. This is a big day for all the Americans on which they celebrate their independence. This let me think about the word itself. What does it mean to be free? Am I free? I mean not only Americans want to gain independent. We all want to be free. But are we actually?

A lot of things have changed in the past years, decades and centuries. And I have to admit that I am very grateful that I live these days than some years ago. Not just that women are not only housewives anymore, that they are also allowed now to do almost as much as men do. There are still some differences, e.g. in the payment, but most of all the two genders are equal.

I also like that people can be who they are. I mean in the Bible we can read that every person is the same and should be respected by the way he or she is and so do also respect others. This was long time ago a big problem and I guess for some guys it still is. If someone is a bit different or not like the average, people judge them for being not normal. Like some days ago when I have seen these Oreo pictures - thanks to Chris Whiting who tweeted that - and the comments of some people about it. Some really wrote just silly stuff which reminds me of how life would like have been some years ago. But in my mind we are civilized now, and I can’t imagine why some people still make such a big deal of something like that.

Every person is free to choose who they love. Of course it’s crazy to think about marrying a manga figure (manga = japanese comic book). I actually read an article on the internet about that some months ago. A grown up Japanese man wanted to marry his favorite manga character. That’s really overdone. But as long as you love another human being - I think it doesn’t matter how old he/she is (of course not an adult and a child, but I guess you know what I mean) or what gender he/she is - everything's fine. Love is so much more. Everyone should be free to choose and free to love.

Freedom gives us the opportunity to live the way we want to. Why should we change our life just because we don’t get accepted by other people? Every person lives only once and this life shouldn’t be wasted. Freedom means for me to do the things you like as long as you don’t harm others. Dare to be yourself. Live your life and not the life others want you to have or live because no one knows you better than you do.

What is freedom for you? Do you feel free? How do you celebrate the Fourth of July?


If you're interested, here is the site about the Oreo's: http://www.tickld.com/t/16149

Full of happiness

Our heart is like a glass filled with happiness – but we don’t recognize that, and so we overfill it. Instead of being more happy, we lose happiness the more we try to fill it.

When I remember about 10 years ago, I was a huge fan of ‘Buffy – The Vampire Slayer’. I loved to watch it, as well as ‘Charmed’ and ‘Angel’. Now the vampires are back. I don’t know what guys these days love about ‘Twilight’ and ‘Vampire Diaries’. Maybe the vampires come back every decade. But what is so fascinating about them? Mostly for the young people? Because they are mean, mysterious, thirsty for blood? Or that they are simply not human?

Well, honestly I don’t think that vampires are less human than we are. No offense, but I think we can be thirsty as a vampire. Why? Let me explain: we want more. Always. No matter what it is. We can never have enough. We want something until we have it and then we want something else. Like a baby who wants to have the toy, the more often you say he or she won’t get it, the more will the baby cry. But when you finally give him the toy, he’s happy and after some minutes he wants to have another toy.

Same is when we are older. So many women want to have a family and a successful career. That’s good, definitely, but some have the wish that everything is easy to handle and just working out perfectly. Okay girls we can multi-task, but is this good if we do it the whole time? Of course not. We can’t be the perfect wife who is always there when their kids need her, e.g. when they are sick. Can we simply cancel the meeting just for that?  We have to find out what is more important to us – being in the office, working over time, and only see the kids when they’re sleeping, or taking care of them, spending time with them and your partner but doesn’t have such a well-paid job.

I saw Lynette on the series finale of Desperate Housewives, struggling with herself. She has always been the tough business lady who wanted big success and she was good at it. But she decided to stay at home, raising her kids. After she broke up with Tom and finally the two found back together in the end, she got a big opportunity to take. She wants to work again because she missed it, but she never regretted spending time at home – maybe sometimes but not overall. She figured out that she always wanted more, after she got Tom back, she also wanted her job back. She has always been like that – when she had one, she wanted to have another thing, too.

We are all like Lynette. We are never satisfied with the things we have. So I do compare us to vampires. We are thirsty all the time. Not for blood, but for other things. We are made like this – especially the commercials and ads use this thinking. We see something and they convince us we want it. And when we have the new Apple, we wait till its next product will be released and we feel that we need to buy it. And I don’t mean an actual apple – if you know what I mean.

Never stop to begin

You start something and realize it doesn’t work? You’re frustrated because of that? Well, try again. Start something new, over and over again. The more you try, the higher will be the chance that it will work. You have to see different possibilities and think about it. To work things out makes you smarter.

If everything would just work when you do it the first time, you would never be challenged. So I guess life would be quite boring because you get used to success. So even when you do something which isn’t actually good, you are sure that it is because it is your idea. Sometimes you have to fail, have to fall, that you can climb up again.

See every failure as a new chance, an opportunity to grow, to reconsider it. To think about making it even better. Ask people for advice, and also help them. This could give you the chance to see it in a different angle. It is like a computer game, and your mission is to realize your dream. And you wouldn’t give up in a computer game, would you? You would fight because you want to enter the next level. The same it is in real life. Try to accomplish your mission the best you can. And afterwards you will be proud of yourself.

And when you figure out that this what you do isn’t working, then try to start the next. A new beginning can also be an improvement to the idea you had before. But when you stop trying, you will never realize your dream. What makes the humankind so special? Well, we can dream, we can believe and we can think about ways to let our imagination become reality.

What is your dream? What are you working for and believing in?

Little wonders

"Stop thinking about fun, have it." - Homer Simpson

Vacation. What a wonderful word. What a wonderful thing to think about. Spending some time somewhere else and forget your everyday problems, the stress that you have in your job. When you don’t have to think about anything, just relax and live for the day. You can do whatever you want, you feel happy and you want that this will be forever.

When someone comes to you, telling that you have to enjoy your stay because soon everything will be again as usual, you get into some kinda panic. Don’t think about it, you say to yourself. You notice that not only you feel happy, that your whole family is happier than ever. You want no change. You don’t want to go back. This cruise, this trip should never end. You might try to convince yourself that there is a chance to let this last forever.

But soon you have to realize that you can’t hold on time. That this can’t last forever. It’s not that you say: this is the only time I had some fun and therefore it’s supposed to be forever, because afterwards you'll have all the stress and worries back. It’s that you appreciate the few happy moments in your life. You wouldn’t be able to do that, if you would only have such pleasant moments. You have to have all the stress as well, that you recognize how wonderful and special the good times are.

Do not think about when you had fun the last time, or think about how great was it back then and how tough it is now. Live every single moment, take any chance of fun. Bart had to realise that in the last Simpsons episode and I like that, because I can understand him. You want to be happy and you want your family to be happy, too. And you do everything that this will remain. But Homer was also right showing him that fun can be everywhere, you just have to be aware of it.

This episode also reminded me of one of my absolute fave songs: Little wonders by Rob Thomas. It describes that you have to appreciate these special, pleasant moments in your life, these little wonders it has to offer you.

The mission of finding

As we all know from the physics lesson there always have to be action and reaction. Otherwise nothing works. So it must exist a second part for everyone. Guys are looking for the right person in their life, they spend lots of time in finding him or her. They are searching all the time, keeping their eyes wide open. But when do you know that you have found the right person? Can you ever be sure about that? Can it be, that you first love someone and then, after some years, love someone else, or do you think if you found the actual right one, you can and will always love him or her for the rest of your life?

Maybe you would say you are changing and so the people around us. For a period of time one can be the right companion, but when you were drifting too far apart, someone else can be the right one. Or you say the right one chances with you, so he or she will always be the perfect fit. Whatever you think about it, it’s true. You have to be happy, every person deserves that. So even if you meet someone new and think you pretend that you can never fall in love with this person because you are in a happy relationship is wrong. If this person can make you happier even if you would have never considered that before and even if you knew that it would maybe hurt too many people, you should do what is right for you. Caring is the true sign that you really love someone. But if love hurts, it’s not the right thing to do. Then you have to find another solution. And then you are back: finding.

The biggest question is: what are you looking for? What do you expect to find? True love? Are you looking for love? When do you know you are in love with someone, and it’s not only a crush? Is there a 'checklist' to be sure? I honestly don’t think that some people look for the wrong thing.
We all know that we can survive even without our heart working. It is not a real life but it is possible. So if we give our heart away we have to be sure that we get another one in return, that we still can really live. If we won’t get it, we are suffering all the time. That is not a real life anymore and we have to find a way to get at least our heart back that we will have the chance to give it to someone who deserves it. So is action and reaction, giving your heart and receiving another in return. Only this is working and that is what we all should be looking for. Then you know, it’s real and love. When you are still living, after you gave your heart someone else.